Chipping in: 2007

How to Find Leaders

A simple copy and paste from the toastmaster website.

Want to find leaders for your organization?

John Maxwell, Ph.D., is an expert on leadership and author of more than 30 books on that topic. In his monthly e-newsletter, Leadership Wired, he answers the question, “How can I be sure to hire the right person?”

To accomplish anything of significance, you must have the right people by your side. Finding a great hire often goes hand in hand with identifying potential leaders. Maxwell credits his friend Fred Smith with helping him arrive at these 11 questions to ask when looking for a leader:
* Does the person question existing systems and push for improvements?
* Do they offer practical ideas?
* When they speak, who listens?
* Do others respect them?
* Can they create or catch a vision?
* Do they show a willingness to take responsibility?
* Do they finish the job?
* Are they emotionally strong?
* Do they possess strong people skills?
* Will they lead others with a servant’s heart?
* Can they make things happen?

Good one.

Lesson learned from the funeral

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Last night I went to friend’s family funeral.

I was amazed by the condolence flowers his family has received and the number of people attending the funeral. I did not realize that his family was that popular and part of that ‘it’ society.

My respect grew tremendously for him last night. Not because I now I realize how well off his family is. But because how grounded he is despite of his family status.

It takes a lot of maturity, self confidence, and awareness to be as humble as he is. I am honoured to be his friend.

Thank you for the lessons learned. Peace and love for your family always.

Job: Homepage and News Country Editor for MSN

Homepage and News Country Editor (3x)
Reports to the Executive Producer

We're looking for someone who is passionate about their local audience, can pick out and follow a good story, and can meet deadlines in a fast-paced environment.

An MSN Homepage and News Country Editor will have the following responsibilities:

Editorial Management. Identify the best stories to feature on the most highly-trafficked areas of the MSN Network; primarily on the homepage but also within Windows Live Hotmail and Windows Live Messenger. Ensure this content is timely, accurate and locally relevant. They must be passionate about local, regional and global news and current affairs;
Content updating and integration. Aside from the above, other Editorial areas need to be updated and kept fresh & relevant in order to engage the audience. Other duties help to ensure our pages are easily crawled by search engines. Duties can include updating news polls, maintaining a professional blog, updating search metadata, picking out and publishing editorial search highlights, selecting and publishing News Special Reports, and updating cross network assets;
Establish, protect and put forth the Editorial Voice. The MSN Editorial Voice is to inform and also be provocative. It is important everything that we do editorially on the homepage and News channel is aligned with that Voice. We do not cover stories normally; we find a different way to approach a story that is captivating to our users. As we relaunch new media channels for MSN it is important that the editorial team can take this Voice and implement and extend this across many categories.
Analysis & continual improvement. Part of our philosophy is to analyse the data we receive to continuously improve our message to our audience. We take advantage of the near-time nature of our medium so we are constantly reviewing how our editorial content performs so we don’t repeat mistakes, we can learn more about our users, and so we can build on the success of our “big-clicking” content.A Homepage and News Country Editor will scan the web for news that is relevant for their users with the objective of attempting to find content that will keep users on our homepage and channels as long as possible.

As the Editorial team needs to ensure content is at its ‘freshest’ and most relevant during peak traffic times for the MSN network, extended operating hours are the norm. Some shift work may be expected. A night-shift team will be maintained during the weekday so it is the responsibility of the Homepage and News Country Editor to ensure that team is properly briefed as to what are the key editorial stories to look out for overnight, what editorial content needs to be updated and that the transitions go smoothly.

We are looking for three News & Homepage Country Editors. One editor each will be assigned to Singapore and Malaysia individually. The remaining editor will cover both Indonesia and the Philippines. All will be initially based in Singapore but should be very familiar with their respective markets.

Required Qualifications:

Bachelor's Degree ideally in Journalism;
Fluent in English and Bahasa
2-3 years editorial web experience in a large portal or media web site where display advertising is the main source of revenue;
Passion for the Web, digital content, and customers;
Strong communications skills;
Comfortable with working with numbers, analytics & measurement;
Self-directed with excellent organizational skills;
Knowledge of and interest in local, regional and global news and current affairs;
A true multi-tasker;
Ability to set and maintain deadlines;
Must possess excellent computer skills including proficiency in Microsoft Excel and Microsoft Word.
Understanding of Web development technologies (i.e. HTML, XML, AJAX, JavaScript, …) is an advantage;
Comfortable with image editing tools such as Photoshop

Desired Qualifications:

Experience working with 3rd party content providers;
Strong work ethic and a high level of professionalism;
Creativity, intelligence, and integrity;

Interested? Email me at general.online@mac.com.

The Anahata Villa and Spa Resort

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I went to Ubud last weekend for the healing power of ikhlas program, co-managed by True Nature Healing and Kata Hati Institute.

I want to tell you more about the program but I am waiting for the handout to be distributed by e-mail. I want to be as exact as I should be. So for the time being, I will share with you the beautiful place that I stayed in: Anahata Villa & Spa Resort.

This is the first paragraph the resort uses to describe itself.

“Nestled in the lush landscape of the Petanu River bank, Anahata is a world class Bali hotel villa. Surrounded by verdant tropical forest and restful waters, visitors to these Bali vacation villas experience the tranquility of a pristine environment with all the amenities of luxurious living.”

You can read more about the resort on its website. But I want to tell you something that is not written in the website or the brochure.

The name. According to the ever-dependable Wikipedia, the Anahata chakra is physically positioned at the heart region. Anahata is associated with the ability to make decisions outside of the realm of karma.

In Anahata, one is making decisions, 'following your heart', based upon one's higher self, and not from the unfulfilled emotions and desires of lower nature.

The wish-fulfilling tree, kalpa taru, resides here, symbolising the ability to manifest whatever you wish to happen in the world.

It is also associated with love and compassion, charity to others, and forms of psychic healing.

Wow what a great choice of name.

The people. I had the pleasure to meet Onie Djatmiko, the owner of Anahata resorts. She—and all her staff, and I do mean all—are so into servicing the guests. And if you know me in person, you know this is a huge compliment.

Can I have hair dryer? Certainly. How do you make this soup? Oh we do this and that. Would you like the recipe?

I left my empty bottle of mineral water on the bar table because I wanted to go the toilet nearby. When I returned, the bottle was already filled in with fresh water.

“Your shuttle to the airport would not leave for another hour. Why don’t you have another cup of tea? On the house.” Enough said.

The river. Oh the river. The resort sits by the junction of two clean clear fresh rivers. The Balinese believes such junction to be a pure and powerful place, an abundance of energy. You have to be there, really be there, to believe it.

My favorite place, the river bank. Early in the morning (or all day, I don’t care). Alone (or with somebody else, does not matter).

Onie, you have one great place. Thank you for sharing.

Pics courtesy of the Anahata resorts.

I am.

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I am my parents' child. I am my siblings' little sister. I am my profession. I am my friends' friend. I am a follower of my religion. I am a citizen of my nation.

Multiple definitions for a single object. Strange.

I try defining me through my problems. But suddenly the problems feel unimportant. Insignificant. Not relevant. Not applicable.

I am nothing but blessed. And loved. And love.

I am you. You are me.Then the I, me, you, we, us, they, them, he, him, she, her, and it get confusing. It does not seem to make sense. Perhaps it is no longer relevant.

Why differentiate?

I am asked to imagine a room, the definition of "me", and to widen it. I imagine breaking the wall and see a green meadow under a bright blue sky.

I feel free until I realize my world is still limited by the ground that I walk on. I still put myself within a boundary. True freedom is still an illusion.

I spoke too soon. I am satisfied prematurely. The ego speaks yet again.

I picture the world only to see that I am the universe, the nature.
I step back to see me more clearly. But no matter how far back I go I still cannot see me. I am nothing.

I wonder.

I am grand but I too am a mere spec.

The duality concept gets confusing. It does not make sense. It is no longer relevant. There is no need to differentiate. No reason to.

There is no plurality. Pick a pronoun and stick with it. One is enough. We do not need more. There is never a need to have more.

I exaggerate, as always.

I want to travel through time. Then it dawn to me there is nowhere to travel through. I cannot see any other destination or dimension.

Present is the only time there is. One tense is enough.

I sit by the river and have an urge to play with the water. I put my feet in the water and move them around. Then I stop and realize that my feet are still moving without me moving them. The river does it for me. Now it makes sense. I smile without wanting to smile.

Let nature take it course. Surrender. Watch wonder unfold.
Live from this on, he smiles and says.

The soul knows. The rest needs to digest.

JakartaDoYoga opens!

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I am so happy for my friend, Yusni. She’s just opened her yoga studio, Jakartadoyoga, in the heart of Jakarta, a life-long dream of hers.

I went there last Saturday during its soft launch titled “Walking meditation and yoga all day long,” in which she held a walking meditation to a near-by park, held a yoga session in the park and five other yoga classes at her studio during that day. A neat and appropriate way of launching a yoga studio.

What I love about Yusni, her studio, and all other events she holds is the fact that you feel like coming to your friend’s event,. You don’t really feel like there is any distance between the organizer and the participants.

And you can feel Yusni’s enthusiasm towards yoga. I come to the studio and feel that the owner of the place has put her heart and soul into preparing and managing the studio.

So, here’s to Yusni, her studio and all the yoga enthusiasts in Jakarta or anywhere else in the world. Kuddos.

For further information, visit www.jakartadoyoga.com, email studio@jakartadoyoga.com, or just drop by Jl Sunda No 7, 3rd Floor, Menteng.

Over one billion rups for ICT innovators

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Microsoft Indonesia and USAID-financed competitiveness project SENADA today launch iMULAI, a national competition and awards program for innovative solutions for business.

The program aims to promote the spirit and importance of innovation among Indonesian business entrepreneurs and support the establishment of Indonesia as a competitive, knowledge-based economy.

The competition, which will run until December 31st, 2007, is open for all Indonesian businesses (both start-up and established) and non-government organizations.

iMULAI will select three winners whose proposals show the most promising innovations and which promise the greatest potential impact on the information technology and communications industry in Indonesia.

Each successful innovation will receive over Rp145,000,000 in hardware and software business technology from Microsoft and Rp220,000,000 in grant financing from SENADA for innovation costs.

For more information, visit the iMULAI website.

Veggie lunch

I over indulged during the weekend. So now it is pay back time.

Here's today's lunch menu.

Nils, you would be proud to know that no animal has been harmed during the production or the consumption process.

Splinters of the universe

[Bahasa Indonesia]
[Once upon a time, my friend Hanny and I had our writer's block. Then we decided to write in each other's blogs instead.

So, ladies and gents, I present you Hanny as my very first guest blogger, whose blog is probably the only site I visit regularly.]

Dear Eva,

I know nothing about spirituality, meditation, or yoga, or those wonderful things that close to your heart. However, as agreed, let’s play Athena in The Witch of Portobello, and I’ll try to start talking about things I know nothing about.

About a year ago, out of nowhere, I decided to use the word ‘splinters’ when I’d like to go anonymous with my writings. I fell in love with the word in high school, when I found it inside a poem by Edith Sodergran, The Stars.

Edith is a poet who introduced Finland-Swedish modernism with free rhythm in her poems, and didn’t receive much recognition in her lifetime, but is now regarded one of Finland’s foremost poets…

Do you think Edith was ahead of her time?
Do you think she resembles Coelho’s Athena—The Witch of Portobello?

Anyway, I don’t want to think of it as a coincidence, but if you look up for the word ‘splinter’ in the dictionary, it means “a small, thin, sharp piece of wood, glass, or similar material broken off from a larger piece”.

What if the larger piece is the universe, Eva? What if I’m a splinter of the universe? What if we’re all splinters of the universe? We are, aren’t we?

So now it’s not that hard to imagine that we’re connected to each other in some way; that we’re capable of doing noble things; that our minds are magnetic and able to draw things we cherish closer to us; that we’re capable of revealing the secrets of the universe, one at a time.

And this, Eva, this is what I called spirituality.

Something that we’ve already had inside of us since birth, running through our veins and pumping our heart; but we kept on searching for it in those long and tiring journeys, only to find out that we’ve never losing it at the first place.

H.

[I didn't change a single letter, Han. I did not need to.

Beautiful, as always.]

One month to go

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Remember that “a significant change in my life in the near future” I spoke about a while ago? Here goes.

I have decided to return to my natural habitat of freelancing. To become a freelance communications specialist (that is the title I give myself in my business card) once again.

And to be honest, actually, this time it is even more than that.

I have two passions in life at the moment (three if you include my family). One is communications. The other is natural healing and all that come along with it (meditation, yoga, spiritualism, etc).

In 2006, I concluded that I still love communications for communications sake. It would still be a thrill to work in the industry. BUT it has to be for a greater good. So I decided to focus on corporate social responsibility issues or development projects.

When the opportunity to be a full-time communications manager in a development project (which is my current job at the moment), I welcomed it with an open arm.

A year has passed. I have come to a different conclusion. It still does not feel 100% right. The soul is tired. The body is too. The brain is puzzled, struggling to find the reasons why.

Along came the Witch of Portobello. The book put me on the contemplative road whose existence was long forgotten. I knew I had to make a choice between the two passions.

Despite all the lessons learned, the social/professional network built, and the so-called impact made over the last year, communications is no longer fun for communications’ sake. For me.

I pictured myself marching on the career path of communications and I am not that fond of what I see. I do not foresee peace. (Granted, perhaps it is just my limited capability and subjectivity to see).

The choice is now clear(er). I will move into healing. I will for the thousandth time push myself into a new area beyond my comfort zone. To become a student one more time. I have met several teachers. I have signed up for two meditation courses in December. It is a start.

Like writing, communications should just be a medium for something greater, or, pragmatically speaking, a way to make a living for me. The focus will be on healing.

The choice is clear but not the road ahead. But that is OK. It is a process. I shall take it one step at a time. With guidance from Him. Or Her. Or something within.

I am counting down for the ship to set sail. Approximately one month from now. Deep breath.

Change of point of view

[Bahasa Indonesia]
It was late at the office. The room was getting dark. I kept staring at my computer’s monitor until it was time for me to go.

I turned around to look at the window, just to see how the traffic was. And I was in awe with what I saw.

An orange sky above the darkened skyscrapers of Jakarta.

The view had always been there to entertain, yet the only thing I stared at until that moment was my computer.

Things we are able to see if only we change our point of view.

Teachers

[Bahasa Indonesia]
This month I have been blessed with encounters with two teachers. People whom I believe have earned their rights to be called teachers. People with such ample amount of knowledge and skills but still manage to be so humble, ordinary and willing to reach out.

Pak Budi. A craniosacral therapist. I was introduced by a friend. I went to his house one night where he held his meditation session. You could not really tell which is him because he just blended with others. The (about) 10 of us chatted for a bit and meditated. Pak Budi then answered all questions asked and even treated one participant.

Pak Irmansyah Effendi. Founder of Reiki Tummo. I took several classes of Reiki Tummo several years back but never really got into it much. A friend YM me one day and said that there will be an alumni gathering with Pak Irmansyah as the speaker. Interesting.

I sat at the first row. The speaker had not arrived yet. Then this rather young guy with untidy hairs and blue-white Hawaiian shirt came and started to set up the notebook and laptop. A lady next to me said “Pak Irmansyah?” and he smiled. My god, that’s Pak Irmansyah? Wow. How come he is so 'ordinary'?

I thoroughly enjoyed both session held by Pak Budi and Pak Irmansyah.

On a 'sadder' note, I have “lost” another teacher this month. Pak Pujo who passed away late last month. I only met him once but he has left such a deep impression to me. His passing made me think about that only time we met. I am sad that I do not have the opportunity to meet him again but thankful for that one time we have met.

People with great wisdom and such humility. Those people have earned the rights to be called “teachers”. And I am thankful for the opportunity to meet them.

Judging by the number of teachers I have met in such a short time, I supposed it is school time again. I look forward to become a student.

For mom and dad

[Bahasa Indonesia]
God, forgive me and forgive my mom and dad.

Love and care for them the way they have loved and cared for me while I was little. Cross that. the way the have loved and cared for me SINCE I was little.

*hugz*

Job op: Public Relations Manager in SENADA

SENADA, a USAID-financed Indonesian competitiveness project, is currently recruiting for a senior Public Relations Manager (Code: PRM).

He or she will develop and lead the implementation of communications strategy for SENADA. The strategy will consist of a master plan to communicate with SENADA’s stakeholders, including the business sectors, the industry or business associations, the government and the general public.

If you meet the above criteria, please send your CV and three professional references (with phone numbers and email addresses) via email to SENADA@dai.com (to be considered position code must be included in the subject of the email) or fax to 021-579-32578 by Wednesday, 24 October 2007. No phone calls will be entertained.

To learn more about the position, you can download this document. For more information about SENADA please visit: www.senada.or.id.

Note: I'tikaf (By A. Chodjim)

[Bahasa Indonesia]
The Arabic word "i’tikaf" gets popular especially towards the end of the fasting month of Ramadhan. People go to mosques, conduct the prayer, read the Qur'an, and spend the whole night (or more) in the mosque.

What is the essence of i'tikaf?

I’tikaf is about contemplation to achieve spiritual transformation. To contemplate on our conduct thus far, to contemplate on our relations with other beings and the whole universe (not just among human).

Al Qur’an does not specify how to conduct the i'tikaf. Thus the imams of the muslim provide the explanation, with some differences in the details.

Whatever the name may be, to me, contemplation is an important thing to do. Contemplation does not mean we think of a certain issue with specific objectives or achievements in mind.

Contemplation means opening self or heart so that the higher energy can infiltrate us, be present within.

The energy that can naturally and automatically guide us in navigating our lives, in harmony with our function and mission in life.

You can download the complete note (in Indonesian) here.

Are we really fasting?

[Bahasa Indonesia]
The traffic in Jakarta has been crazy (or crazier) these last several days. Not sure what this has anything to do with the fact that Idul Fitri is just about a week away.

I still do not see the connection, why the traffic has gone worse in the third week of Ramadhan compared with the first week of Ramadhan.

Anyway, here I was, stuck in the midst of this craziness. I looked around. I presumed most of the people on the road were fasting.

They say that fasting is to train us to be more patience. To better control ourselves. To refrain ourselves not just from food, drinks and sex, but also to "hunger" ourselves from all negative emotions.

Yet all I could see, could experience, at that time in the middle of the traffic jam was how aggressive people got when they were driving. The vehicles were barely inches from one another. Motorcycles going here and there, trying to find the narrow gap between cars for them to pass by.

Nobody wanted to give way to another. When somebody tried to move in front of the cars, you could see the sudden increased of intensity in the drivers’ face.

So I wonder, how many of us really fast. And I hope to God that towards the end of the month, we all can celebrate Idul Fitri --- the return to our pure-self.

The Witch of Portobello

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I wasn't that interested in Paulo Coelho's novels anymore. With all due respect to the gifted writer. It was just not my cup of tea.

So when the Witch of Portobello came out, I was not exactly running to the bookstore to get it.

That was, before a trusted friend recommended the book to me.

I was curious. I knew and trusted her preference in books.

On the same day she sms-ed me to recommend the book, I went to the bookstore, bought myself a cup of coffee, and sat at the coffee shop for hours reading that book.

I went home and continued reading it. I finished the book in one day. I could not put it down.

Then I told another friend about this book. Her response was unexpected. She said, "So what's the result?" An sharp and odd response to a story about reading a book. It was a good question though. What was the result?

The result was it got me thinking about something I had not thought about for quite some time. Threw me back into an introspective and retrospective mode.

So if there will be a significant change in my life in the near future, you can blame it on Coelho. Or thank him.

On being a student

[Bahasa Indonesia]
There was a long discussion about the poem I put in the previous entry. One friend was a teacher. He said sometimes he signs up for classes just to be a student again.

I have different opinion.

To me it is easy to be a student when you are actually a student. If I sign up for a class, of course I feel like a student because I am literally a student.

What would be more challenging is to be a student every single second of life. To have that humbleness that I can learn from the person in front of me because there is something he/she knows that I don't. To have that zeal, that eagerness to learn.

Be honest. When you are a manager, a director, a vice president, a senior at your office, and you are faced with an intern who barely graduates from college, can you feel like a student to this intern? Or would you roll your eyes and grumble every time he/she says or does something 'ridiculous'? Yes, I thought so.

I could not get the poem out of my head that evening. It was like a reminder (to not say slap me on the face) to this confident, arrogant, know-it-all person to learn from every single person or single incident that passes by in her life.

I threw myself to something completely new sometimes, intentionally or unintentionally. To be a first grade student one more time.

Perhaps it is time for me to do it again.

It is a pleasure to be a student

I am a student.
I have been a student as long as I remember
And it is a pleasure to be a student.

It is a pleasure to learn that I don't know.
It is a pleasure to learn that I already know.
It is a pleasure to learn that I was mistaken.

It is a joy to learn from Great Masters.
It is a joy to learn by sharing what I learnt.
It is a joy to learn how to be what I am.

I seek to learn about the world around me.
I seek to learn about what I actually am.
I seek to learn how to be a proper human being.

Clouds show me the nature of my world.
Rivers show me the nature of myself.
Babies show me how to be more human.

I am a student.
I will be a student as long as I live.
And it is a pleasure to be a student.

A poem by Ringu Tulku Rinpoche. Read during a Beshara gathering.

Quiet

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have just realized it has been some time since I last wrote in my blogs. Any of my blogs. Not that I don't want to. Not that I don't have the time.

But I just don't know what to write.

I don't know what to write. That is a scary thought.

A friend once told me that she thought my writing while I was in Spain was good. She asked whether it was because of the ambiance, or the state of heart that I was in. It was both.

If I write well when my surrounding was conducive and the heart is in the right state, what does "don't know what to write" mean? That's a scary thought.

Lost kid

Yesterday my family had dinner in an outdoor restaurant, celebrating my nephew's birthday.

On our way out, suddenly there was this four year old kid tagging along. So my brothers and sister started asking, where was your mom and dad? The kid did not say a word and there was no adult part from my family.

So my family stopped. My brother returned to backtrack our route, trying to find the kid's family. He did not return until he found it while the rest of us waiting patiently with the kid.

The kid was returned to his family. We went home.

Happy birthday, ji. You have a good loving family.

How can you call yourself good?

[Bahasa Indonesia]
A friend asked. Let’s call this friend A him and the other B her, for the sake of this conversation. A and B used to be friend, but not anymore. It was a heated separation. (and I am being modest in my use of words).

Basically A thinks B is a snake, and the feeling is mutual. Different animal but on par. So friend A said to me, “How can you call yourself good when you are still friend with her?”

Good question, I thought. Well, first of all, I never call myself good. Second, is it wrong to make friend with those who are considered to be snake by more than one person (to say the least)?

I actually discussed this with the snake herself, I mean, B, without refering specifically to A. I said, “perhaps that is because I believe that you will not bite me”

She responded, “You should not say that. That is called arrogance. Instead, you should say because you don’t have any bad intension against me.”

She was right. I don’t have any bad intension and therefore, God’s willing, it is safe to play with the snake. Even the snake has its wisdom.

SMS

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I received an sms today. A cousin of mine, his child died in the womb, before birth.

I don’t know what to say. I remember once a friend ask what would be one of the things that I fear most and I answered, “to see my children die before I do.”

I don’t know why I said such thing. I don’t have a child yet. I can only imagine. Actually, I probably cannot. And I hope I will not. Ever.

.hope you are well.

The King Inside

And without further ado, the second one:

The King Inside

There are people with their eyes open
Those hearts are shuts. What do they see? Matter.

But someone whose love is alert,
Even if the eyes go to sleep,
He or she will be walkng up thousands of others.

If you are not one of those light-filled lovers,
Restrain your desire-body’s intensity.
Put limits on how much you eat
And how long you lie down.

But if you are awake here in the chest,
Sleep long and soundly.
Your spirit will be out roaming and working,
Even on the seventh level.
Muhammed says, I close my eyes and rest in sleep,
But my love never needs to rest.

The guard at the gate drowses.
The king stays awake. You have a king inside
Who listens for what delights the soul.

That king’s wakefulness
Cannot be described in a poem.

Taken from Coleman Bark's A year with Rumi, daily readings, June 17th, p195.

Beyond Love stories (2)

The first of the two Rumi's poets. For those who observe the fasting of Ramadhan. And those who walk a similar path of cleansing the soul.

May we obtain more than just hunger and thirst.

Beyond Love stories (2)

You risk your life to feed desires,
Yet you give your soul only short grazing spans,
And those grudgingly.

You borrow ten and repay fourteen.
Most of your decisions can be traced back
To cuisine and sex.

The fuel basket goes from one stokehole
To the next. Six friends hoist
Your handsomeness and carry it
To the cemetary.

Food changes going from table to latrine.
You live between deaths,
Thinking this is right enough.

Close these eyes to open the other.
Let the center brighten your sight.

Taken from Coleman Bark's A year with Rumi, daily readings, June 16th, Page 194.

Info: Sustainable home furnishings design competition

Double click for bigger picture.

Note: The pearls of living in peace (By Arif Rachman)

[Bahasa Indonesia]
The note was made during Pak Arif's speech in the comemoration of my sis's mother-in-law's passing.

Pak Arif opened his speech by stating the usual “Assalamu alaikum wr wb. Shawalat and salam..“ and followed by saying “prayers and peace be upon all of us, especially to the host of this event and to our teachers.”

A verse in Al Qur’an urged us to fast so that we can become the person of faith (takwa). Takwa should be the end, the destination of our journey.

That is why we are given clues, a key to heaven named Al Qur’an, whose first verse contains an order for all of us to read (iqra). Not just plain reading, read to understand, to do, to make it part of our personality and a tool for all of us to live in harmony.

This state of harmony is something that we should work on. There are five pearls to living in peace, in harmony:
1. Remember Allah, in every second of our lives.
2. Conduct everything without expecting anything in return, ikhlas. Pak Arif said that if we want to learn the word “ikhlas”, the best teacher is our mother.
3. Shalat. Pray. In shalat, we are reminded of our mission in life, in the prayer “indeed, my shalat, my life, my death is only for God.”
4. Be patient. Patience that is accompanied by our obidience to God, a lot of good conducts and night prayers to ask for forgiveness.
5. Be thankful. Pak Arif said that nowadays people are much better in complaining. Endlessly. Where in fact, our complaints can close the door to what He wants to open for us.

Complete note (in Indonesian language) can be downloaded here.

Note: On fasting (by Bapak Memed)

[Bahasa Indonesia]
This note discussed about the foundation of fasting, which is QS Al Baqarah (2):183-188, and the its objectives. There are three objectives in fasting:

First: takwa - to increase the quality of the person, to become a person of real faith, those who maintain himself (from wrongdoings), who seek to be closer to God, who fear God (acknowledge God as the higher power) and who feel like he is being watched by God.

Second: syakirin – to be thankful. To realize what we have all these times, to accept, to take care and to utilize them well.

Third: rasyidin – to live a clean life, the correct way of living.

These verses, especially the one that talk about alms giving, are also emphasizing the social value of fasting. So that we do not forget those who are less fortunate that we are.

So that we will not create a weak future generation, physically and mentally – there should be improvements in nutrition and education. If not us, who else?

At the end of our fasting, the real test is to evaluate our lifestyle after Ramadhan, the way we talk, the way we act and how we use our wealth.

Have a great fast. I apologize for all my mistakes. I sincerely hope that we can improve ourselves to the “takwa” level, and not just feel the hunger and thirst.

Complete note (in Indonesian language) can be downloaded here.

True colors

You with the sad eyes
don't be discouraged
oh I realize
it's hard to take courage
in a world full of people
you can lose sight of it all
and the darkness inside you
can make you fell so small

But I see your true colors
shining through
I see your true colors
and that's why I love you
so don't be afraid to let them show
your true colors
true colors are beautiful
like a rainbow

Show me a smile then
don't be unhappy, can't remember
when I last saw you laughing
if this world makes you crazy
and you've taken all you can bear
you call me up
because you know I'll be there

And I'll see your true colors
shining through
I see your true colors
and that's why I love you
so don't be afraid to let them show
your true colors
true colors are beautiful
like a rainbow

.happy birthday.

Message of the week: pray

[Bahasa Indonesia]
The message sometimes seem to get subtler by the day.

This week has been one busy week for me. A couple of days ago, a passer-by in my old blog left a comment. Somehow she (I presume, a she) advised me to pray, because prayer has such great power.

Yesterday I realized that my driver’s license was not where it usually was. I kept thinking about it but could not bring myself to remember what I did with it.

You see, I have a habit to not bring a bag and put my ID card in the bag of whoever was with me at that moment.

This morning, as I was leaving the house, I asked You-Know-Who to let me remember. Suddenly my mind wondered to my sister.

I tried to remember when the last time I went out with her and I did not bring my bag with me. Owh, that one evening in our home town. Now, where exactly did I put the ID card? Hm, the camera pouch.

It just so happened that I have that very pouch in my bag. I took it out of the bag and looked inside. There it was. My driver’s license.

I felt like He was saying, “…all you have to do is ask...”

(Traffic) Jammin'

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Today the street is really 'jammin'. My usual commuting time of 3/4 hour has turned into 3 to 4 hours.

My thought goes to Sutiyoso and his plan to build a bus way on this very street that I was stuck in, turning the two-lane street (one way) into one-lane. That would be the day.

But traffic jam is always a good training ground for me. It makes me aware of the fluctuation of my (im)patience. And tonight was no mean an exception.

I can hear people honking impatiently. All looking very tired. Eager to get home yet having no clue how to get there (sooner).

I saw a young couple with a young child riding a motorcycle sharing one raincoat. And I think of those who do not even have proper cover from the rain.

I saw another child at the gas station playing happily with his mom, probably glad to have the five minute break after the long ride.

I saw the fried rice street vendor getting more customers than he usually does.

And I saw my house. Feeling happier to see it than I usually do.

It was also one of those on-the-road moments when I thought, hm, bathroom would be good.

Behind each eye

Today as I was reading the usual A year with Rumi book, I cheated, pop. I skipped June 19, 20, and 20 to peek at June 22, your birthday. I wanted to know what he writes for June 22. And I felt my eyes watering.

The poem entitled "Behind each eye"

Spring overall. But inside us
there is another unity.

Behind each eye
one glowing weather.

Every forest branch moves differently
in the breeze, but as they sway,
they connect at the roots.

I know you have moved on and I won't be the one who holds you back.

Yet I also know you are always be here for me. Because we are always one. United. Connected at the roots. With you cheering at me. Praying. Glowing. With God's love.

I miss you so much, especially at times like this. I love you. And wish you well.

Patience

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Have you ever gone out of a mall, looked at your parking ticket and found out that you have spent about three hours and ONE minute. Which means that we have to pay an extra hour for that one minute. Annoying (to me).

And on those times, my impatience shows its ugly face. So when I am in a certain mood, I would rush to ensure that I do not have to pay that extra minute. Unnecessary, I know.

So earlier tonight I deliberately train my patience. In the gym, I glanced at the clock, I knew it was going to be tight. So I consciously slowed down. I locked my locker carefully. I took my time in drying my hair.

There was an instance when I lost that rhythm. Suddenly when I was about to open my locker, I took the wrong key. I realised this and I returned to the rhythm. Aware.

The parking ticket was in my car key wallet and I deliberately did not even take a peek at it. I walked slowly to my car. Went down on the escalator and did not try to speed up my walk.

I got into my car and drove to the exit gate. Only when I was near to the gate, I took out the parking ticket and looked.

I went in at 19:44:53. I came out at 21:43:59.

God really does have great sense of humor.

“Sahabat”

[Bahasa Indonesia]
This is one of the things that I like about Indonesian language. There are several words we use when referring to friends. There are “teman”, “kawan”, and there is “sahabat”. Every Indonesian knows where the difference lies, although not most people probably have a hard time giving the exact definition.

But that is the way it is. We use the word “teman” very lightly. I want to you meet my “teman”. My high-school “teman”, my work “teman”, etc. But we use “sahabat” very carefully and selectively.

That was what happened to me recently. I was telling a “teman” (or “sahabat”?) about my “sahabat”. And she said, “You must be very close to them.”

Why, I asked. She said, “Because you seldom refer to a person as a “sahabat”.” Much less a group of people. I did not even realise that habit until that moment. That’s true.

But the ones whom I was telling her about were indeed my “sahabat”. My friends for more than fifteen years, who have seen all the changes that I have gone through, my ups and downs, and yet they have stuck around me all these years.

Those who just smile and give a “whatever” look when I am in one of those moods, when I decide to do something odd (which is probably more often that I want to admit).

Those whom I do not have to say anything to to know what is going on in my mind. Sometimes they just give me a pad in the back or just wrap their arms around me. Those who can leisurely say, “My God, you look ugly.”

The 91 girls. Here’s to a lifetime of rollercoaster ride, here’s to a life long friendship. Love you all to bits.

A Pilgrim for Life

[Bahasa Indonesia]
We continued talking about writing. This time it was about writing for our personal blog. You said, “Your writing in your previous blog while you were in Spain was very good. Why was that? Was it because of the ambiance?”

This got me curious. Yes, why is that? So I accessed my previous blog and started reading. It was a bit overwhelming, actually, to read the blog one more time. It brings back so many things in mind, or rather, in heart.

The most beautiful writing is when we write with our heart. And we cannot write with our heart unless we are in touch with it. That is why it was different then than it is now.

When I returned from Spain, I told a friend it was easy for me to feel in peace while I was in Spain. The challenge is to keep that sensation, that state of heart, in the bustling busy city of Jakarta, in the midst of all the deadlines at work and issues with families, friends and the country.

I told you (readers, visitors), that I felt like I am starting to write in a more contemplative mode again. I supposed that is my sanctuary. My escape when the soul is too tired of dealing with all the unnecessary things in life. When the signal to refocus is so strong.

Just like you said, whichever road we choose to travel, we will always encounter problems. Different problems, but there will always be problems. Challenges that we need to overcome to help us grow. No use of saying “if I had done this, I would have..”.

It is time to retreat to that state again, when I am in peace with myself, when I am in touch with my heart. And refocus myself to walk in my personal journey as a pilgrim for life.

This time it is a step tougher though. This time, we do this in the midst of the bustling busy city of Jakarta, complete with all the deadlines at work and issues with families, friends and the problems faced by the country.

As my yoga teacher once said as we end our yoga session with the savasana (corpse pose), “as you open your eyes and end this session, try to maintain the savasana within you.”

I look forward to the time when I come to the realization, as another teacher said, that there will be a time when we do not seek solution for our problem anymore. Because life is one major solution on itself.

On writing

[Bahasa Indonesia]
It is funny to listen, to see you getting so excited over writing. Not funny, funny. But funny, happy. The kind of funny that brings a smile on my face and in my heart.

I too share the same passion. To express myself in writing. Whenever I have a writer’s block when writing for my work, I always write in my blog first, to get the creative juice going. Whenever I feel sad or upset, I too write.

But my way of writing is very different from yours, or any other people for that matter. Some people write serious stuff, political etc. Some write in a cynical way. Some write in a very poetic way. In an innocent child kind of way. My writing is very straight forward.

I supposed you can learn a lot from a person’s written work. Not just from what he or she writes, but also from how he or she writes it.

My writing? Straight forward. Yet sometimes full of symbols. Paradoxical.

Reunion, deunion

[Bahasa Indonesia]
It is sad how reunion sometimes do not do justice for its true meaning: to come together again so as to be connected or to come into close association or relationship.

Some reunions even causes the oppositve things. The committee for the reunion argues endlessly with one another over small matters when preparing the reunion.

This happens even when a group of people get together for a good cause. (speaking from a rather personal experience.) Even with good intension in mind and an abundance of knowledge on spirituality (whatever that means), we can end up with endless arguments, resentments and negativities.

Then re-union becomes de-union. Unfortunate. Unnecessary. Sad.

First impression. Last impression.

[Bahasa Indonesia]
We talked about first impression. Last impression. I supposed it is a topic close to our heart, (professional heart that is, if there is such thing) since we are in communications field.

People often talked about the importance of first impression. To me last impression is just as important.

Last impression is more complicated than first impression though. Because is the sum of all the impression people gather from the first time they met us until the very last minute.

It is probably an impression closer to the truth as well. Again, since it is the sum of all our actions and words, whose control has gotten looser as we are unable to keep our true personalities hidden.

It is the lingering impression people keep in their head and most probably tell other people about. We all know how poisonous grape-vine can be.

An actor is only as good as his last film. A writer is only as good as her last book.

.staying cryptic.

A fulfilling breakfast

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I had breakfast with a dear friend last Saturday for about two and a half hours. It was one of those times when I felt time passed by. Yet I have carried so many memories from that chat.

She is my friend. Mentor. Sister. Yet the proudest role she has ever played in her life time, I am one hundred percent sure, has nothing to do with me. It is to be the mother of a child. A very lucky child.

When she writes in her blog, you would understand what Judy Ford meant in her book “Wonderful ways to love a child” when she said, “While laughing with your child, you will take a peek at heaven.”

And, to quote from that beautiful book one more time, I know she will smile her distinctive smile, when I say that “parenting is a two way street: as you take the child by the hand, they will take you by the heart.”

This and the four subsequent threads were based on our conversation. Happy Birthday.

Contemplative

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have just realized that my recent threads have gotten back to being very contemplative and idealistic.

I wonder what it means. I have a hunch, but I am not ready to share it.

Happy independence day

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Today Indonesia is celebrating the 62nd anniversary of its independence day. I was trying to find the right picture for this thread.

My choice goes to the picture below, showing the double badminton players from Indonesia: hendra Gunawan and Joko Riyadi during the current World Championship in Malaysia.

The picture was taken from a Kompas Cyber Media article titled “Pebulutangkis Indonesia Terus Melaju.” – Indonesian badminton players keep advancing. Look at the single-minded-ness, the fighting spirit and the determination obviously reflected on their face.

But more than that, it is how I feel, and wish, about my country and my people: that we keep advancing. I am tired of people complaining about the state of the country. It is time to change our frame of mind and be more optimistic, constructive, and active.

Just like what the T-shirt I saw in the shopping mall today said: “You have to be the change that you want to see.” Spot on.

Start doing something. Anything.

We have received so much

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Still from the conversation with Pak Brotoseno.

We spoke about contemplation. We spoke about feeling grateful. To contemplate how much we have received from everybody and every single thing in nature.

Look at the obvious. People who have explicitly and directed given us many things. Our parents. Our teachers. Our friends. Our sponsors.

Look at the less obvious. This plate of rice that we are eating. The farmers that grow the rice. Those who help the farmers harvest. The people who make the fertilizer. People who buy the rice from the farmer. People who transport the rice from the farmer to the store. People who sell the rice. People who buy and cook the rice for us. People who serve us the rice.

That's only for the rice. Look at the other food we eat, the plate, the cutlery, the chairs and tables, the lights and lamp, the roof above us. And contemplate on the same process. The people with whom we enjoy the meal.

Look beyond people. The air we breathe. The freshness of water that quenches our thirst. The birds. The flowers. Feast for our senses.

Look at how much we have been given.

So when we start doing or giving something, see it not as if they owe us anything. Because we have been given a lot more. Think of it as us giving back, as a token of appreciation, to other people, to the society, to nature.

Of course there are people or occasions that cause us hurt, heartache, anger. But when we start seeing that so many people are doing good, how many we have been receiving from so many people and things, we start realizing that the number of people doing us good far exceed the number of people who cause us hurt and anger. This number becomes insignificant.

Be grateful. Start doing something. Anything.

Persona: Pak Broto and Pak Pujo

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Last weekend me and my fam went to our hometown, Solo. My sister wanted to find some antiques for her house. She was referred by a friend to this person: Pak Brotoseno.

When we got there, it turned out that he was not into antiques anymore, rather he is making some wooden furniture. It was obvious how he really loves his work. And only did what he wanted to do. What a beautiful thing to do. or to be.

I went to the second level of his house and I asked what this room was for. He said he is teaching meditation every night. Hm.

Without thinking much at all, I said that I would return that night. And I did. We (Pak Broto, his father Pak Pujo, my sis and I) chatted. The topic of the night was an introduction to meditation. Pak Pujo led the discussion.

We were taught and we practiced some meditation techniques. He said that a meditator must overcome five challenges: greed, anger, sloth, hesitation and fear.

Greed is interesting. There are obvious greed. But there is also a more subtle greed, which we often overlook. When we are happy, we want to hold on to that happiness. That's greed.

When we feel peace, we do not want it to end. That is greed. Tough.

One paradox that he mentioned was that to feel peace, one should not desire peace. A saying that I should contemplate first before I even begin to understand.

Neither Pak Broto nor Pak Pujo did not ask for a single dime for the nighly session. They even provide some snack and drink. Pak Pujo said that he did not pay for the lessons he has learned so why should he charge for the ones he is giving. "This is my way of giving back, because this is the only thing I can do." Simple, humble.

At nine pm, he looked at me and he said "I think this is enough for tonight?". And the session ended. When I was about to go home, Pak Pujo was sitting on the floor, eyes stuck on the TV in front of him. Such innocence.

The humbleness in attitude and in spoken words, yet such wisdom and sincerity. I cam to this place to find antiques, and I found myself a new teacher. Thank you.

ps: He reminded me of you, pop. Down to the body language. But most of all your straighforwardness, simplicity, humbleness, and great wisdom.

With or without mustache?

[Bahasa Indonesia]
The regional election day when Jakarta votes to elect a new governor.

So, Jakartanians, which would it be?

Double standards

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have just had a good conversation tonight with a friend. (Actually every conversation with her is a good one). We talked about this and that. One particular subject stuck in mind. Hope she does not mind.

You know when you get too close to a subject or a person, our view become not so objective anymore. The perception is skewed. We begin to apply double standards. I will use general examples.

We cannot bare hearing a parent shout to their children or seeing someone being rude to other people. Yet sadly we sometimes shout at ours and treating others with disrespect.

We know as parent we should help children be independent. Yet we cannot help but overprotect ours.

We say we respect those who are different from us, for instance in religion or sexual inclination. But what happen if our family choose to be “different”? Do we respect them as well?

We tell people to slow down, enjoy life and not to work too hard. How about us?

I supposed that is when we need other people to pull as back to our path. When we need to listen to our heart. Really listen. Thanks, friend.

The great teachers of life

[Bahasa Indonesia]
One of the biggest obvious blessings in my life (apart from my family) is the things that I have learned just by watching people around me.

People who make their way by using their own two hands. They did not come from a wealthy family yet look at where they are now financially speaking. The survivors.

People who are so content about their live, so grateful. People with so much compassion and peace within. People with such a humble heart and endless passion to help others.

People with such great ignorance and greed. People who complain about everything. People who run endlessly like a dog chasing its own tail.

People who have gone through some really tough times in their live and thrive. Who have been through hell and back and live to tell about it. People who have gone through tough times but barely surviving. And those who do not survive at all—whether they are aware or not.

A great blessing because I need not go through what they have gone through. Because if I do, I am unsure whether I will be as strong as they are.

All the great teachers in my life. All I have to do is watch. And learn.

Iyegar yoga retreat

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Somehow all interesting stuff in life starts with “coincidences”. I was not planning to join this yoga retreat with Ann Barros in Ubud Bali.

But ‘coincidently’, my friend kept asking me whether I wanted to come. ‘Coincidently’, I was joining another yoga retreat that made me change my mind, and ‘coincidently’ my workload has got me thinking “perhaps a little break would be nice..”

And I do not have a single regret. This is my first encounter with Iyegar yoga, whose emphasis is on precision and alignment in all postures.

And Ann, which has been teaching for about thirty years, really knows what the students can and cannot do. “Respect our limitations”, “Work with your limitations.”

There was no TV and no phone (although I have one deadline for one article writing, quite alright). There was only nature and good friends.

But the best entertainment always come from the silence of nature. When we sit still and breath the environment, free from pollution—air pollution as well as noise. Ubud is indeed magical, somehow.

At the end of every class, we greeted each other with “Namaste”, which means “I honor the Divine in you of Love, of Light, of Truth. I honor that place in you and that place in me where we are One”

Perhaps this is my way. I am comfortable with yoga, as training ground to achieve the inner stillness and samadhi, or simply making me physically fit and more flexible. Whether we realize it or not. Whether we intend to or not.

Note: Pictures to be uploaded later. Hopefully.

Home

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I felt so tired today at the office. I thought I was going to be ill. All I wanted was to go home and meet my family. Then I went home. The drive home was slow. Yet I felt better, bit by bit.

I got home. And somehow, relieved. Like a huge weight has been llifted up from my shoulder. I chatted with my family. We laughed. We had dinner.

It is good to be home. Good to have a place we can call home. Thank You.

Five days of yoga and little else

I have just returned from a five day yoga 'retreat' with Ann Barros. One of the nicest short getaway I have ever had.

I just want to say that at the moment. Will write a bit more later. First thing first. Reading Harry Potter.

Worth it

[Bahasa Indonesia]
A friend of friend was working his b*tt off. He stayed at the office until late night after night. One day he sms-ed his manager, "I am so tired". He SMS-ed twice. He went home. Late. Again.

The next thing they heard about him was that he had passed away. Makes you wonder doesn't it? Is it all really worth it? Let's see..

Should he help?

[Bahasa Indonesia]
My friends (let’s say a male, “he”) is quite well off. An advantage that leads to dilema. An advantage that are often misused, abused, by other people.

People then think of him as a source of unending wealth. There are always ‘friends’, family, relatives who come to him to borrow or ask for money. With various reasons/excuses. Illness. School tuition for the children. Pay the rent. Payment for other debts (with interests). Opening a business.

When this happens, my friend is always confused, should he help? Not that he is a scrooge, he is just uncertain. How does he know that that person is honest and not playing around with him? What's with the excuses? Especially when it is not the first time that that person comes to him.

I understand the confusion. I too am unsure. Should he help?

Keep the dreams alive, folks

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I always love to hear my friends’ dreams. I do believe that everything starts from a dream. But we cannot stop there. Let's turn them into objectives, targets and think of ways to achieve them.

That is why every time a person told me about his/her dream, I tend to say, “That’s great. Make it real.” Sometimes I think I have more faith in them than themselves.

Life often make us afraid to dream. We choose to make “pragmatic” decisions, with all the “logical” reasons. We end up with status quo, although not without eruptions of complains here and there. Useless.

Then my brain starts to think of ways to help turn the dreams into reality. By giving ideas, or finding people who might be able to help.

A friend wants to open a coffee shop. Let’s do it. Establish a spiritual healing center out of town. Ok. Similar center in the city. Sure. Initiate a movement that reminds us of forgotten social values. That sounds great.

Have a tuition-free school. With pleasure. Establish a company that helps other companies improve their social activities. Cool. Become a writer. Why not? (Yes, I am talking about you). One friend even wants to be a governor. That too, the country needs a person like him.

One is only limited by his/her dreams. So keep the dreams alive.

Start doing something. Anything.

Party

I was attending a friend’s farewell party at a hotel. I was early, so I sat in the hotel lounge. Next to me was a group of people, cosmopolitan socialités. I could not help hearing their conversation.

They were talking about setting up a party. A real party from the sound of it. The rave music they want to use. The glitzy lighting. The avant garde decoration. The drinks. The food, or should I say hors d’oeuvres.

Wow. I did not realize how distant I am now to that life now. I could not remember the last time I attended that kind of party.

It is not that it is good or bad. It is just what it is. I have just realized how different my life is now. Moving on.

Safe haven

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Do you have a place where you can freely cry and pour your heart out without anybody making judgement about you? I do. Or at least I used to have one. The catholic churches.

If you see my ID card, I am not catholic. Yet I find this place welcoming. I used to come there often. At one time, everyday. Perhaps historically speaking, churches are safe havens. It is my safe haven. It used to be.

But here, now, where the religion is not exactly the majority's, where you feel like you know everybody (and they all know you), and where you know that people are sensitive with inter-religion practices, suddenly safe haven is not so safe anymore.

I miss that.

Taufik Savalas II

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Still continuing on the same topic. From another angle. When I arrived home, I turned on the TV. My mother said that a lot of people attended Taufik’s funeral. Praise the Lord. Such a huge amount of attention put on the passing of one Taufik Savalas.

As the TV show was over, I flicked to another TV channel, Metro TV. Headline News. A ship accident somewhere in the Eastern Indonesia. 120 passengers. They have found 30 so far, two died.

120 people went missing and most probably would not survive the accident. I wonder how much attention people would put on these 120 missing people. Or the 30 million people living below the poverty line in Indonesia.

Taufik Savalas I

[Bahasa Indonesia]
This morning people were taken back by the news that comedian Taufik Savalas has died from an accident. The guy was known for his sense of humor, kindness and humbleness. All comes from God and will eventually return to Him.

I was touched by all the impressions Taufik made among his friends – as his friends were interviewed by the TV channels. The sympathy that he had received was overwhelming and was obvious, judging by the TV and radio news coverage.

“He is not a big guy, but he is kind,” said Ulfa, one of his best friends. Patience and pleasing for everybody.

Pleasing for everybody. That was the topic of today’s radio talkshow. Looks like that is the message of the day for me.

The death of someone, anyone, always makes us think of our own death. What kind of impression will you leave behind among friends and family when you die?

"When I am rich, I will do more social activities"

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have heard this many times. Too many. The problem is people seldom feel that they are rich enough, never enough. We are always too busy with 'other priorities' so they end up never doing any deeds for other people.

Back to the "being rich" issue. I think we all know that helping is not equal to money and, hence, no need to wait for us to be rich. I have just discussed this with another friend this afternoon. And I told her a story..

I have a friend named Prita. She likes to distribute meal for the homeless. Shec cooks it herself. It is more cost effective, and itjust makes it 'a total effort' for her.

One day her neighbor came to her. The neighbor is by no means rich. She (the neighbor) said, "I don't have much money, so I cannot chip in any money to this effort."

She added, sincerely, "But can I help cook and distribute the meal?"

It really does not need money. We can give our time and a hand. Or thoughts. Or intension. Or even a smile.

.start doing something. anything.

Back to school

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Next week the school season starts again. Are your kids or nephews and nieces going back to school?

Now let me ask, are your maid's, driver's, security guard's, neighbor's, office janitor's kids going back to school as well? Have you asked?

Pic: Bu Sudan's Istiqon school.

.start doing something. anything.

Semarang

I have just returned from a business trip in Semarang. It was a good trip. I have good friends in Semarang. It was a nice trip.
Pic: overlooking Simpang Lima, from the 7th Fl of Ciputra Hotel.

Rumi: Your first eyes

A lover has four streams inside,
of water, wine, honey, and milk.

Find those in yourself and pay no attention
to what so-and-so says about such-and-such.

The rose does not care
if someone calls it a thorn, or a jasmine.

Ordinary eyes categorize human beings.
That one is a Zoroastrian. This one a Muslim.

Walk instead with the other vision given you,
your first eyes. Bow to the essense
in human being. Do not be content
with judging people good and bad.
Grow out of that.

The great blessing is that Shams
has poured a strength into the ground
that lets us wait and trust the waiting.

Taken from p174 of Coleman Barks's A Year with Rumi.

-snif-

post script: I like the way he called "the other vision" our first eyes, instead of the third eye as we often refer to it. These eyes are indeed our first eyes, the ones we should use when we look at the world. The ones that see things as they are. As beautiful as they really are.

Note: Quraish Shihab – things that He likes

[Bahasa Indonesia]
We like to do things that we like, and not what He likes. We like to do our fasting, night prayers, but we keep hating, not giving to our people, and we keep lying. We like to make ourselves pretty yet we seldom clean up ourselves.

A hadits kudtsi said that (God says that): if a person trying to get close to me by doing what I like, I will like him back eventually. And when I like him, My sight becomes his, My hearing becomes his, My arms become what he use to reach out with, and My legs become what he use to walk with.

Thus, it is important to know what He likes. According to the Quran, two of his most favorite people are those who are:
- Just. The kind of justice that can make everybody happy.
- Kind, even to those who have done him wrong.

Complete note of this discussion (In Indonesian) can be downloaded from here.

Accept what can be accepted. Appreciate the difference among us. Each with her/his own’s needs and stage of growth.

For mom

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I am quoting a quote taken from Mbak Lita’s pages. The thread was originally posted by Ira Lathief in August 2006. The posting was titled “"Don't know what I've got until it's gone..."

It is in Indonesian, so allow me to translate it to English:
One and a half year ago, my mom passed away. There are so many things that I have not told her.
"Mom.. at last I have been accepted for a job. This is due to your prayer.”
“Mom.. here’s my first paycheck. I should give it all as a present to you.”
“Mom.. I will receive a bonus soon. When I receive it, let’s go on a trip.”

And, when the time comes, I will not be able to tell her..
“Mom.. meet my future husband.”
“Mom.. please give me your blessings, I want to get married.”
"Mom.. this is your grandchild, teach my how to be a great mother like you.”

A mother is like air to breathe to human life. It is so grand yet rarely we notice it, until it is gone.

Here’s to all the mothers in the world. Huge hugs, kisses and love to mine.

Postscript: I forwarded this to a friend. His response was “So, love ur mum, while she is still with you, Va.”

Dream on

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Still from the interview with Yos Luhukay. A person is only limited by her dreams. How brave are we to dream? Perhaps the majority of us are being pragmatic, realistic. Trapped in our current condition.

Don’t be. Let’s start from the end. Try to imagine, have a vision, of what we want to achieve in certain stages of our lives, in terms of career, personal, family and spirituality. After that, back track to what we should do to achive it. What we should do now.

Does what we are doing right now support our vision? Decide on how long we should stay in our current place, what the end target in this place is.

These words have made me think. I can imagine what I want to be. I am questioning whether I have done enough to achieve it. Perhaps not.

I became sad. But sad is not what I should be. I should try. I should do my best. I should be what I want to become.

Make yourself obsolete

[Bahasa Indonesia]
A brilliant suggestion by Yos Luhukay, during an interview by Trijaya FM last Friday. Wherever you are, make yourself obsolete. Train your people to do what you do, so that you become obsolete (and thus are free to go your merry way whenever you want to).

I recently helped manage an event in my project. All I did was give a bit of suggestions here and there. The rest was my colleagues’ doing. I felt happy and proud to see the event went very well. I felt that I have become obsolete. And I felt happy.

-Perhaps now I can go my merry way. Perhaps I should. Second sign.-

In memoriam: Bu Zul

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Last week my mom lost a close friend, Bu Zul. The last time I met Bu Zul was about a couple of weeks ago. My family (about 12 of us) had just had a family breakfast in a restaurant. Mom insisted we visited Ibu Zul, bringing her some pancakes from the restaurant.

Bu Zul was lying on her bed. She looked weaker than usual. I was a bit stunned. She looked.. Anyway, each of us kissed her by her cheeks. And to each, she gave us her prayers, different from one to another.

Still, the news came as a surprise somehow. The night before she still called some of her friends. At midnight, her sister called all her children to come to the house.

She had a fall out recently with one of her daughters, but they had reconciled. To her, she asked her forgiveness. The daughter said, “no mom, it was my mistake. I am the one who should apologize.”

Bu Zul asked her to recite a prayer. The daughter did and Bu Zul said amen to every phrase. Then Bu Zul recited her own prayer, in Javanese, and that was it. She passed a way. What a beautiful way to go.

May God grant her with peace and His light for the rest of her journey. Thank you for being such a good and loyal family friend.

[Pic: jasmine, her favourite flower. Taken from here.]

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