“Sahabat”

[Bahasa Indonesia]
This is one of the things that I like about Indonesian language. There are several words we use when referring to friends. There are “teman”, “kawan”, and there is “sahabat”. Every Indonesian knows where the difference lies, although not most people probably have a hard time giving the exact definition.

But that is the way it is. We use the word “teman” very lightly. I want to you meet my “teman”. My high-school “teman”, my work “teman”, etc. But we use “sahabat” very carefully and selectively.

That was what happened to me recently. I was telling a “teman” (or “sahabat”?) about my “sahabat”. And she said, “You must be very close to them.”

Why, I asked. She said, “Because you seldom refer to a person as a “sahabat”.” Much less a group of people. I did not even realise that habit until that moment. That’s true.

But the ones whom I was telling her about were indeed my “sahabat”. My friends for more than fifteen years, who have seen all the changes that I have gone through, my ups and downs, and yet they have stuck around me all these years.

Those who just smile and give a “whatever” look when I am in one of those moods, when I decide to do something odd (which is probably more often that I want to admit).

Those whom I do not have to say anything to to know what is going on in my mind. Sometimes they just give me a pad in the back or just wrap their arms around me. Those who can leisurely say, “My God, you look ugly.”

The 91 girls. Here’s to a lifetime of rollercoaster ride, here’s to a life long friendship. Love you all to bits.

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A Pilgrim for Life

[Bahasa Indonesia]
We continued talking about writing. This time it was about writing for our personal blog. You said, “Your writing in your previous blog while you were in Spain was very good. Why was that? Was it because of the ambiance?”

This got me curious. Yes, why is that? So I accessed my previous blog and started reading. It was a bit overwhelming, actually, to read the blog one more time. It brings back so many things in mind, or rather, in heart.

The most beautiful writing is when we write with our heart. And we cannot write with our heart unless we are in touch with it. That is why it was different then than it is now.

When I returned from Spain, I told a friend it was easy for me to feel in peace while I was in Spain. The challenge is to keep that sensation, that state of heart, in the bustling busy city of Jakarta, in the midst of all the deadlines at work and issues with families, friends and the country.

I told you (readers, visitors), that I felt like I am starting to write in a more contemplative mode again. I supposed that is my sanctuary. My escape when the soul is too tired of dealing with all the unnecessary things in life. When the signal to refocus is so strong.

Just like you said, whichever road we choose to travel, we will always encounter problems. Different problems, but there will always be problems. Challenges that we need to overcome to help us grow. No use of saying “if I had done this, I would have..”.

It is time to retreat to that state again, when I am in peace with myself, when I am in touch with my heart. And refocus myself to walk in my personal journey as a pilgrim for life.

This time it is a step tougher though. This time, we do this in the midst of the bustling busy city of Jakarta, complete with all the deadlines at work and issues with families, friends and the problems faced by the country.

As my yoga teacher once said as we end our yoga session with the savasana (corpse pose), “as you open your eyes and end this session, try to maintain the savasana within you.”

I look forward to the time when I come to the realization, as another teacher said, that there will be a time when we do not seek solution for our problem anymore. Because life is one major solution on itself.

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On writing

[Bahasa Indonesia]
It is funny to listen, to see you getting so excited over writing. Not funny, funny. But funny, happy. The kind of funny that brings a smile on my face and in my heart.

I too share the same passion. To express myself in writing. Whenever I have a writer’s block when writing for my work, I always write in my blog first, to get the creative juice going. Whenever I feel sad or upset, I too write.

But my way of writing is very different from yours, or any other people for that matter. Some people write serious stuff, political etc. Some write in a cynical way. Some write in a very poetic way. In an innocent child kind of way. My writing is very straight forward.

I supposed you can learn a lot from a person’s written work. Not just from what he or she writes, but also from how he or she writes it.

My writing? Straight forward. Yet sometimes full of symbols. Paradoxical.

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Reunion, deunion

[Bahasa Indonesia]
It is sad how reunion sometimes do not do justice for its true meaning: to come together again so as to be connected or to come into close association or relationship.

Some reunions even causes the oppositve things. The committee for the reunion argues endlessly with one another over small matters when preparing the reunion.

This happens even when a group of people get together for a good cause. (speaking from a rather personal experience.) Even with good intension in mind and an abundance of knowledge on spirituality (whatever that means), we can end up with endless arguments, resentments and negativities.

Then re-union becomes de-union. Unfortunate. Unnecessary. Sad.

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First impression. Last impression.

[Bahasa Indonesia]
We talked about first impression. Last impression. I supposed it is a topic close to our heart, (professional heart that is, if there is such thing) since we are in communications field.

People often talked about the importance of first impression. To me last impression is just as important.

Last impression is more complicated than first impression though. Because is the sum of all the impression people gather from the first time they met us until the very last minute.

It is probably an impression closer to the truth as well. Again, since it is the sum of all our actions and words, whose control has gotten looser as we are unable to keep our true personalities hidden.

It is the lingering impression people keep in their head and most probably tell other people about. We all know how poisonous grape-vine can be.

An actor is only as good as his last film. A writer is only as good as her last book.

.staying cryptic.

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A fulfilling breakfast

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I had breakfast with a dear friend last Saturday for about two and a half hours. It was one of those times when I felt time passed by. Yet I have carried so many memories from that chat.

She is my friend. Mentor. Sister. Yet the proudest role she has ever played in her life time, I am one hundred percent sure, has nothing to do with me. It is to be the mother of a child. A very lucky child.

When she writes in her blog, you would understand what Judy Ford meant in her book “Wonderful ways to love a child” when she said, “While laughing with your child, you will take a peek at heaven.”

And, to quote from that beautiful book one more time, I know she will smile her distinctive smile, when I say that “parenting is a two way street: as you take the child by the hand, they will take you by the heart.”

This and the four subsequent threads were based on our conversation. Happy Birthday.

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Contemplative

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have just realized that my recent threads have gotten back to being very contemplative and idealistic.

I wonder what it means. I have a hunch, but I am not ready to share it.

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Happy independence day

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Today Indonesia is celebrating the 62nd anniversary of its independence day. I was trying to find the right picture for this thread.

My choice goes to the picture below, showing the double badminton players from Indonesia: hendra Gunawan and Joko Riyadi during the current World Championship in Malaysia.

The picture was taken from a Kompas Cyber Media article titled “Pebulutangkis Indonesia Terus Melaju.” – Indonesian badminton players keep advancing. Look at the single-minded-ness, the fighting spirit and the determination obviously reflected on their face.

But more than that, it is how I feel, and wish, about my country and my people: that we keep advancing. I am tired of people complaining about the state of the country. It is time to change our frame of mind and be more optimistic, constructive, and active.

Just like what the T-shirt I saw in the shopping mall today said: “You have to be the change that you want to see.” Spot on.

Start doing something. Anything.

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We have received so much

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Still from the conversation with Pak Brotoseno.

We spoke about contemplation. We spoke about feeling grateful. To contemplate how much we have received from everybody and every single thing in nature.

Look at the obvious. People who have explicitly and directed given us many things. Our parents. Our teachers. Our friends. Our sponsors.

Look at the less obvious. This plate of rice that we are eating. The farmers that grow the rice. Those who help the farmers harvest. The people who make the fertilizer. People who buy the rice from the farmer. People who transport the rice from the farmer to the store. People who sell the rice. People who buy and cook the rice for us. People who serve us the rice.

That's only for the rice. Look at the other food we eat, the plate, the cutlery, the chairs and tables, the lights and lamp, the roof above us. And contemplate on the same process. The people with whom we enjoy the meal.

Look beyond people. The air we breathe. The freshness of water that quenches our thirst. The birds. The flowers. Feast for our senses.

Look at how much we have been given.

So when we start doing or giving something, see it not as if they owe us anything. Because we have been given a lot more. Think of it as us giving back, as a token of appreciation, to other people, to the society, to nature.

Of course there are people or occasions that cause us hurt, heartache, anger. But when we start seeing that so many people are doing good, how many we have been receiving from so many people and things, we start realizing that the number of people doing us good far exceed the number of people who cause us hurt and anger. This number becomes insignificant.

Be grateful. Start doing something. Anything.

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Persona: Pak Broto and Pak Pujo

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Last weekend me and my fam went to our hometown, Solo. My sister wanted to find some antiques for her house. She was referred by a friend to this person: Pak Brotoseno.

When we got there, it turned out that he was not into antiques anymore, rather he is making some wooden furniture. It was obvious how he really loves his work. And only did what he wanted to do. What a beautiful thing to do. or to be.

I went to the second level of his house and I asked what this room was for. He said he is teaching meditation every night. Hm.

Without thinking much at all, I said that I would return that night. And I did. We (Pak Broto, his father Pak Pujo, my sis and I) chatted. The topic of the night was an introduction to meditation. Pak Pujo led the discussion.

We were taught and we practiced some meditation techniques. He said that a meditator must overcome five challenges: greed, anger, sloth, hesitation and fear.

Greed is interesting. There are obvious greed. But there is also a more subtle greed, which we often overlook. When we are happy, we want to hold on to that happiness. That's greed.

When we feel peace, we do not want it to end. That is greed. Tough.

One paradox that he mentioned was that to feel peace, one should not desire peace. A saying that I should contemplate first before I even begin to understand.

Neither Pak Broto nor Pak Pujo did not ask for a single dime for the nighly session. They even provide some snack and drink. Pak Pujo said that he did not pay for the lessons he has learned so why should he charge for the ones he is giving. "This is my way of giving back, because this is the only thing I can do." Simple, humble.

At nine pm, he looked at me and he said "I think this is enough for tonight?". And the session ended. When I was about to go home, Pak Pujo was sitting on the floor, eyes stuck on the TV in front of him. Such innocence.

The humbleness in attitude and in spoken words, yet such wisdom and sincerity. I cam to this place to find antiques, and I found myself a new teacher. Thank you.

ps: He reminded me of you, pop. Down to the body language. But most of all your straighforwardness, simplicity, humbleness, and great wisdom.

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With or without mustache?

[Bahasa Indonesia]
The regional election day when Jakarta votes to elect a new governor.

So, Jakartanians, which would it be?

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Double standards

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have just had a good conversation tonight with a friend. (Actually every conversation with her is a good one). We talked about this and that. One particular subject stuck in mind. Hope she does not mind.

You know when you get too close to a subject or a person, our view become not so objective anymore. The perception is skewed. We begin to apply double standards. I will use general examples.

We cannot bare hearing a parent shout to their children or seeing someone being rude to other people. Yet sadly we sometimes shout at ours and treating others with disrespect.

We know as parent we should help children be independent. Yet we cannot help but overprotect ours.

We say we respect those who are different from us, for instance in religion or sexual inclination. But what happen if our family choose to be “different”? Do we respect them as well?

We tell people to slow down, enjoy life and not to work too hard. How about us?

I supposed that is when we need other people to pull as back to our path. When we need to listen to our heart. Really listen. Thanks, friend.

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The great teachers of life

[Bahasa Indonesia]
One of the biggest obvious blessings in my life (apart from my family) is the things that I have learned just by watching people around me.

People who make their way by using their own two hands. They did not come from a wealthy family yet look at where they are now financially speaking. The survivors.

People who are so content about their live, so grateful. People with so much compassion and peace within. People with such a humble heart and endless passion to help others.

People with such great ignorance and greed. People who complain about everything. People who run endlessly like a dog chasing its own tail.

People who have gone through some really tough times in their live and thrive. Who have been through hell and back and live to tell about it. People who have gone through tough times but barely surviving. And those who do not survive at all—whether they are aware or not.

A great blessing because I need not go through what they have gone through. Because if I do, I am unsure whether I will be as strong as they are.

All the great teachers in my life. All I have to do is watch. And learn.

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Iyegar yoga retreat

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Somehow all interesting stuff in life starts with “coincidences”. I was not planning to join this yoga retreat with Ann Barros in Ubud Bali.

But ‘coincidently’, my friend kept asking me whether I wanted to come. ‘Coincidently’, I was joining another yoga retreat that made me change my mind, and ‘coincidently’ my workload has got me thinking “perhaps a little break would be nice..”

And I do not have a single regret. This is my first encounter with Iyegar yoga, whose emphasis is on precision and alignment in all postures.

And Ann, which has been teaching for about thirty years, really knows what the students can and cannot do. “Respect our limitations”, “Work with your limitations.”

There was no TV and no phone (although I have one deadline for one article writing, quite alright). There was only nature and good friends.

But the best entertainment always come from the silence of nature. When we sit still and breath the environment, free from pollution—air pollution as well as noise. Ubud is indeed magical, somehow.

At the end of every class, we greeted each other with “Namaste”, which means “I honor the Divine in you of Love, of Light, of Truth. I honor that place in you and that place in me where we are One”

Perhaps this is my way. I am comfortable with yoga, as training ground to achieve the inner stillness and samadhi, or simply making me physically fit and more flexible. Whether we realize it or not. Whether we intend to or not.

Note: Pictures to be uploaded later. Hopefully.

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Home

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I felt so tired today at the office. I thought I was going to be ill. All I wanted was to go home and meet my family. Then I went home. The drive home was slow. Yet I felt better, bit by bit.

I got home. And somehow, relieved. Like a huge weight has been llifted up from my shoulder. I chatted with my family. We laughed. We had dinner.

It is good to be home. Good to have a place we can call home. Thank You.

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Five days of yoga and little else

I have just returned from a five day yoga 'retreat' with Ann Barros. One of the nicest short getaway I have ever had.

I just want to say that at the moment. Will write a bit more later. First thing first. Reading Harry Potter.

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Worth it

[Bahasa Indonesia]
A friend of friend was working his b*tt off. He stayed at the office until late night after night. One day he sms-ed his manager, "I am so tired". He SMS-ed twice. He went home. Late. Again.

The next thing they heard about him was that he had passed away. Makes you wonder doesn't it? Is it all really worth it? Let's see..

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Should he help?

[Bahasa Indonesia]
My friends (let’s say a male, “he”) is quite well off. An advantage that leads to dilema. An advantage that are often misused, abused, by other people.

People then think of him as a source of unending wealth. There are always ‘friends’, family, relatives who come to him to borrow or ask for money. With various reasons/excuses. Illness. School tuition for the children. Pay the rent. Payment for other debts (with interests). Opening a business.

When this happens, my friend is always confused, should he help? Not that he is a scrooge, he is just uncertain. How does he know that that person is honest and not playing around with him? What's with the excuses? Especially when it is not the first time that that person comes to him.

I understand the confusion. I too am unsure. Should he help?

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Keep the dreams alive, folks

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I always love to hear my friends’ dreams. I do believe that everything starts from a dream. But we cannot stop there. Let's turn them into objectives, targets and think of ways to achieve them.

That is why every time a person told me about his/her dream, I tend to say, “That’s great. Make it real.” Sometimes I think I have more faith in them than themselves.

Life often make us afraid to dream. We choose to make “pragmatic” decisions, with all the “logical” reasons. We end up with status quo, although not without eruptions of complains here and there. Useless.

Then my brain starts to think of ways to help turn the dreams into reality. By giving ideas, or finding people who might be able to help.

A friend wants to open a coffee shop. Let’s do it. Establish a spiritual healing center out of town. Ok. Similar center in the city. Sure. Initiate a movement that reminds us of forgotten social values. That sounds great.

Have a tuition-free school. With pleasure. Establish a company that helps other companies improve their social activities. Cool. Become a writer. Why not? (Yes, I am talking about you). One friend even wants to be a governor. That too, the country needs a person like him.

One is only limited by his/her dreams. So keep the dreams alive.

Start doing something. Anything.

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Party

I was attending a friend’s farewell party at a hotel. I was early, so I sat in the hotel lounge. Next to me was a group of people, cosmopolitan socialités. I could not help hearing their conversation.

They were talking about setting up a party. A real party from the sound of it. The rave music they want to use. The glitzy lighting. The avant garde decoration. The drinks. The food, or should I say hors d’oeuvres.

Wow. I did not realize how distant I am now to that life now. I could not remember the last time I attended that kind of party.

It is not that it is good or bad. It is just what it is. I have just realized how different my life is now. Moving on.

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Safe haven

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Do you have a place where you can freely cry and pour your heart out without anybody making judgement about you? I do. Or at least I used to have one. The catholic churches.

If you see my ID card, I am not catholic. Yet I find this place welcoming. I used to come there often. At one time, everyday. Perhaps historically speaking, churches are safe havens. It is my safe haven. It used to be.

But here, now, where the religion is not exactly the majority's, where you feel like you know everybody (and they all know you), and where you know that people are sensitive with inter-religion practices, suddenly safe haven is not so safe anymore.

I miss that.

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Taufik Savalas II

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Still continuing on the same topic. From another angle. When I arrived home, I turned on the TV. My mother said that a lot of people attended Taufik’s funeral. Praise the Lord. Such a huge amount of attention put on the passing of one Taufik Savalas.

As the TV show was over, I flicked to another TV channel, Metro TV. Headline News. A ship accident somewhere in the Eastern Indonesia. 120 passengers. They have found 30 so far, two died.

120 people went missing and most probably would not survive the accident. I wonder how much attention people would put on these 120 missing people. Or the 30 million people living below the poverty line in Indonesia.

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Taufik Savalas I

[Bahasa Indonesia]
This morning people were taken back by the news that comedian Taufik Savalas has died from an accident. The guy was known for his sense of humor, kindness and humbleness. All comes from God and will eventually return to Him.

I was touched by all the impressions Taufik made among his friends – as his friends were interviewed by the TV channels. The sympathy that he had received was overwhelming and was obvious, judging by the TV and radio news coverage.

“He is not a big guy, but he is kind,” said Ulfa, one of his best friends. Patience and pleasing for everybody.

Pleasing for everybody. That was the topic of today’s radio talkshow. Looks like that is the message of the day for me.

The death of someone, anyone, always makes us think of our own death. What kind of impression will you leave behind among friends and family when you die?

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"When I am rich, I will do more social activities"

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I have heard this many times. Too many. The problem is people seldom feel that they are rich enough, never enough. We are always too busy with 'other priorities' so they end up never doing any deeds for other people.

Back to the "being rich" issue. I think we all know that helping is not equal to money and, hence, no need to wait for us to be rich. I have just discussed this with another friend this afternoon. And I told her a story..

I have a friend named Prita. She likes to distribute meal for the homeless. Shec cooks it herself. It is more cost effective, and itjust makes it 'a total effort' for her.

One day her neighbor came to her. The neighbor is by no means rich. She (the neighbor) said, "I don't have much money, so I cannot chip in any money to this effort."

She added, sincerely, "But can I help cook and distribute the meal?"

It really does not need money. We can give our time and a hand. Or thoughts. Or intension. Or even a smile.

.start doing something. anything.

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Back to school

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Next week the school season starts again. Are your kids or nephews and nieces going back to school?

Now let me ask, are your maid's, driver's, security guard's, neighbor's, office janitor's kids going back to school as well? Have you asked?

Pic: Bu Sudan's Istiqon school.



.start doing something. anything.

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Semarang

I have just returned from a business trip in Semarang. It was a good trip. I have good friends in Semarang. It was a nice trip.
Pic: overlooking Simpang Lima, from the 7th Fl of Ciputra Hotel.

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Rumi: Your first eyes

A lover has four streams inside,
of water, wine, honey, and milk.

Find those in yourself and pay no attention
to what so-and-so says about such-and-such.

The rose does not care
if someone calls it a thorn, or a jasmine.

Ordinary eyes categorize human beings.
That one is a Zoroastrian. This one a Muslim.

Walk instead with the other vision given you,
your first eyes. Bow to the essense
in human being. Do not be content
with judging people good and bad.
Grow out of that.

The great blessing is that Shams
has poured a strength into the ground
that lets us wait and trust the waiting.

Taken from p174 of Coleman Barks's A Year with Rumi.

-snif-

post script: I like the way he called "the other vision" our first eyes, instead of the third eye as we often refer to it. These eyes are indeed our first eyes, the ones we should use when we look at the world. The ones that see things as they are. As beautiful as they really are.

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Note: Quraish Shihab – things that He likes

[Bahasa Indonesia]
We like to do things that we like, and not what He likes. We like to do our fasting, night prayers, but we keep hating, not giving to our people, and we keep lying. We like to make ourselves pretty yet we seldom clean up ourselves.

A hadits kudtsi said that (God says that): if a person trying to get close to me by doing what I like, I will like him back eventually. And when I like him, My sight becomes his, My hearing becomes his, My arms become what he use to reach out with, and My legs become what he use to walk with.

Thus, it is important to know what He likes. According to the Quran, two of his most favorite people are those who are:
- Just. The kind of justice that can make everybody happy.
- Kind, even to those who have done him wrong.

Complete note of this discussion (In Indonesian) can be downloaded from here.

Accept what can be accepted. Appreciate the difference among us. Each with her/his own’s needs and stage of growth.

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For mom

[Bahasa Indonesia]
I am quoting a quote taken from Mbak Lita’s pages. The thread was originally posted by Ira Lathief in August 2006. The posting was titled “"Don't know what I've got until it's gone..."

It is in Indonesian, so allow me to translate it to English:
One and a half year ago, my mom passed away. There are so many things that I have not told her.
"Mom.. at last I have been accepted for a job. This is due to your prayer.”
“Mom.. here’s my first paycheck. I should give it all as a present to you.”
“Mom.. I will receive a bonus soon. When I receive it, let’s go on a trip.”

And, when the time comes, I will not be able to tell her..
“Mom.. meet my future husband.”
“Mom.. please give me your blessings, I want to get married.”
"Mom.. this is your grandchild, teach my how to be a great mother like you.”

A mother is like air to breathe to human life. It is so grand yet rarely we notice it, until it is gone.


Here’s to all the mothers in the world. Huge hugs, kisses and love to mine.

Postscript: I forwarded this to a friend. His response was “So, love ur mum, while she is still with you, Va.”

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Dream on

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Still from the interview with Yos Luhukay. A person is only limited by her dreams. How brave are we to dream? Perhaps the majority of us are being pragmatic, realistic. Trapped in our current condition.

Don’t be. Let’s start from the end. Try to imagine, have a vision, of what we want to achieve in certain stages of our lives, in terms of career, personal, family and spirituality. After that, back track to what we should do to achive it. What we should do now.

Does what we are doing right now support our vision? Decide on how long we should stay in our current place, what the end target in this place is.

These words have made me think. I can imagine what I want to be. I am questioning whether I have done enough to achieve it. Perhaps not.

I became sad. But sad is not what I should be. I should try. I should do my best. I should be what I want to become.

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Make yourself obsolete

[Bahasa Indonesia]
A brilliant suggestion by Yos Luhukay, during an interview by Trijaya FM last Friday. Wherever you are, make yourself obsolete. Train your people to do what you do, so that you become obsolete (and thus are free to go your merry way whenever you want to).

I recently helped manage an event in my project. All I did was give a bit of suggestions here and there. The rest was my colleagues’ doing. I felt happy and proud to see the event went very well. I felt that I have become obsolete. And I felt happy.

-Perhaps now I can go my merry way. Perhaps I should. Second sign.-

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In memoriam: Bu Zul

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Last week my mom lost a close friend, Bu Zul. The last time I met Bu Zul was about a couple of weeks ago. My family (about 12 of us) had just had a family breakfast in a restaurant. Mom insisted we visited Ibu Zul, bringing her some pancakes from the restaurant.

Bu Zul was lying on her bed. She looked weaker than usual. I was a bit stunned. She looked.. Anyway, each of us kissed her by her cheeks. And to each, she gave us her prayers, different from one to another.

Still, the news came as a surprise somehow. The night before she still called some of her friends. At midnight, her sister called all her children to come to the house.

She had a fall out recently with one of her daughters, but they had reconciled. To her, she asked her forgiveness. The daughter said, “no mom, it was my mistake. I am the one who should apologize.”

Bu Zul asked her to recite a prayer. The daughter did and Bu Zul said amen to every phrase. Then Bu Zul recited her own prayer, in Javanese, and that was it. She passed a way. What a beautiful way to go.

May God grant her with peace and His light for the rest of her journey. Thank you for being such a good and loyal family friend.

[Pic: jasmine, her favourite flower. Taken from here.]

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Passing the torch: Rockin' girl blogger award

[Bahasa Indonesia]
Thanks, Han, for passing the torch of the Rockin’ Girl Blogger Award. Five females, in no particular order.

My first choice, is you ☺. Hanny with her berada di sini. I used to own a book titled “Write from the heart”. What I only read, Hanny has already done: writing from the bottom of her heart.

Second, same with Hanny’s, Mbak Lita with her precious moments. The blog is a mother’s dedication to her child. I seldom come across a blog that can make me shed a tear. I guess a mother’s love is really like no other. Precious.

Third, another Han(n)y. Suryatmaning Hany with her matahari dan bintang. All is fun and interesting. Life is easy and leisurely. Even fried banana sold by the small shop next door sounds so good if Hany says so. Nothing important yet so intriguing. Crazy girl.

Fourth, might not be accessible to all because it is in friendster. Anne’s Tequila shot for the soul. Can you guess what it is all about? Cool name. Cool pics. Cool girl.

Fifth (starting to do a little bit of thinking here), I would go for Dee. But not her serious blog. Dee as a contemplative figure needs no introduction. But Dee with her unessential thoughts, that is more interesting. Still a new blog but such a great idea. It shows you how many little jokes in life that you just pass by without even noticing, or enjoying, or giggling about. What a waste of entertaining opportunity.

Pass on the torch, girls. Keep blogging.

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Grants for innovative business ideas

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Some things are worth promoting.


SENADA, a USAID-financed project on Indonesia’s competitiveness, has launched a 1,000,000 USD grant fund today for firms, institutions and organizations that have innovative ideas for a more competitive Indonesia.

Proposed innovations may be in the form of new products or services that add value or reduce costs, initiatives that capture or retain customers or provide new services, and an idea that creates a more business friendly environment.

No matter what innovation specifically is, it should benefit not only the grantee, but should also have a wider impact that will improve the competitiveness of its industry value chain.

Check out the SENADA Business Innovation Fund's website.

.start doing something. anything.

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Kindness

[Bahasa Indonesia]

As usual I have this 'belief' that anything that happens to me, or passes by me, twice carries a message for me personally.

This week's word is: kindness.

That's all I can say right now. Kindness. I am still digesting what this message might mean.

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Another day at the office

[Bahasa Indonesia]

It was not my best day yesterday at the office. Too many people missing too many deadlines. And some who did meet the deadline, submitted less than ideal quality of work.

There was even one point when I got a bit speechless. (me? speechless?). Instead of asking my favorite series of "why" questions, the only statement that came out of my mouth was "Oh for God's sake." Me stop asking questions, I supposed that is when you (and I) need to start worrying.

Time for a coffee break.

post script: The best moment yesterday was as I was leaving the office, that entertaining receptionist of mine was making her usual (or unusual) gesture of saying goodbye with her usual wide (a bit on a naughty side) smile. She probably did not realize how that has ended my day at the office on a high note.

The bestest moment however was when I went to my sis's new house last night after work and hanged around with my family. The most loving and lovable weird bunch of people. And always with good food.

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The best sound in the world

A friend was talking about about picking up her seven years old daughter. "On the drive home," she said, "I reached her and tickled her bare leg. She laughed ... the best sound in the whole world!"

:)

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How do you treat a person?

[Bahasa Indonesia]

How you talk about a person when that person is around is important.
How you talk about a person when that person is not around is more important.

How you treat your friends is important.
How you treat your enemies is more important.
(not to mention interesting).

Because that is what defines your characters.

Whatever you say about a person, you should be able to say the same thing to that person directly. If not, then consider yourself out of line.

Don’t say it is difficult to change. Don't give me the excuse that "it's human nature". It's a matter of practice. A matter of habit.

Arfan Pradiansyah. Trijaya FM. Earlier today.



PS: Thoughts lead on to purposes; purposes go forth in action; actions form habits; habits decide character; and character fixes our destiny.--Tryon Edwards

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Sush

[Bahasa Indonesia]

What do you do when you know something that no other does? What do you do when (you know) you cannot tell anybody about it? You keep your mouth shut. Thank you for your trust. You.

But btw, Mr. Thich Nhat Hanh, I think I might need your refuge island of Sati, Smarti, and Panya.

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Persona: Mbak Lina

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I love meeting inspiring people. I met one when last week: Mbak Lina my yoga instructor from Balance Yoga, Yogyakarta. She came across very humble, just like any rather young Javanese mother. But this impression quickly grew stronger as I was listening to her stories.

I shall just share one story with you. Her child has downsyndrome. She did not give up though. She kept her positiveness and went here and there to help her child grow.

The child did grow into a marvelous kid. But Mbak Lina did not stop there. She established a foundation to help other families with downsyndrome children.

She rightly put it that in cases like this, the key is the mother. It is the mother who will break or make the child. (Salute to all mothers, hugs and kisses to mine).

I told my friend about Mbak Lina. I told her that what crossed my mind was the fact, the realization, that I am nothing, still a long way to go, compared to Mbak Lina. My friend’s response was that she often felt that way with just about anybody. Slap Slap to me.

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Silence

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I have this belief (or superstition) that if something happens or is spoken to me twice, especially when one occurrence happens right after the other, then it is a message to me, it is something I need to think of.

This week, it was the topic of pure silence. The inner silence.

On Thursday night, I was listening to a radio talk show that happened to discuss this inner silence. Then there was another conversation with my friends last night which brought up more or less the same topic.

Anyone who read my blog or know me would know that I am into spirituality, whatever the word may mean to you. So the topic of silence is nothing new, theoriticaly speaking. Practically speaking, my life has been, and is still, full of hustle and bustle.

I sent a question through the sms to the radio station. It came late in the hour, so they just rushed through reading it. The only respond that I had from the speaker was “that’s technical.”.

It was a perfect response. Probably I have been too hung up with technicallities, when I should have just let me be. In complete silence.

-Then off I went to search the word “silence” in google and wikipedia. Looks like I have a long way to go. -

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A yoga weekend retreat at Losari

I went to Losari Coffee Plantation last weekend for a Yoga Weekend retreat arranged by Yogya-based Balance Yoga.

Wow. That was the first word that came out of my mouth when I first got there. Followed by a long sigh. Second word: HUNGRY. It was about 3pm and I had not had my lunch. And you know how I feel (and behave) during late lunch.

But then things just got better. This neat resort surrounded by eight volcanoes is just a perfect weekend getaway. In three phrases: great view, great activities, great friends.

Great view – imagine this: hectares and hectares of green spaces made of gardens and coffee plantation, ethnic village-type houses, blue clear swimming pool, with a view of eight volcanoes. All well maintained yet not over the top manicured. Enough said.

Great activities – The yoga sessions were great. But I have to admit the MASSAGE is better ☺. Chat with friends were great. The best thing to do, sometimes though, is NOTHING. Just sit there, breathe. Let nature exhibit its best entertainment.

Great friends – that open up, that just let me be how I want to be, that listen, talk and laugh together, and that share the same dream: how about making a spiritual healing center that embrace everybody and anybody (or in Anne Marie’s term: a spiritual supermarket).

I will hand over the floor to the pictures to describe the experience better.



Again. Wow. Followed by a long sigh.

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Education and SMEs

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I remember passing by a riverbank one day, where all the small wooden huts reside. I asked my friend how we can eliminate them. He simply responded, by erradicating poverty. So true. How?

Education and SME development. I really truly believe those were the two things that will revive my country. Don’t ask me to give you the comprehensive logical argument on why I believe it, I just do.

Education. No further argument needed.

Small and medium enterprises. The majority of companies in Indonesia is considered to be a small or medium companies. The majority. Can you imagine if most of them grow? Can you imagine how strong the economy would be?

Again, how to do that?

The million dollar question. I will quote another friend when I asked him, “What can we do?” He said: just do what we can. Spot on, babe. You're thinking too much. Stop thinking, start doing.

What can we do? A lot of things. Look at the family of those who work for you. The office boy. The driver. The maid. The street hawker that pass by your house everyday.

Do you have time to spare, skills to share? Volunteer. Support any type of social activities around you, whichever you are comfortable with, does not really matter.

Do you like to write? Then for God’s sake start writing. Anywhere.

Do you have money? Donate. Give up those four cups of Starbuck's coffee a month and give the money to the needy instead.

Be a true professional at what you do, whatever it may be. No corruption. No complaints. If you are a consultant, consult well. If you are a business planner, plan it well. If you are a teller, count well. You have a job? Consider yourself lucky.

Smile and say hello to those who open the door for you, to those who clean up your desk, to those who take you to work, to those strangers whom you meet at the lift everyday.

If you can’t do all the above, at least please do not make the condition any worse. The signs are everywhere. What are you waiting for?

Start doing something. Anything.

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What a nice weekend

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I was supposed to go with some friends. They cancelled on the last minute. I just said the usual “Oh well.” And I am off to Plan B: spending time with my best friends. I knew they just so happened to go to the same destination. What a ‘coincidence’.

[I’ll post our pics later]

“Aren’t you upset” some asked.

How can I complain, when my plan B was being with my best friends? Perhaps I should even thank those who had made the last minute cancelation of the trip.

What a nice weekend it turned out to be. Thank you.

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Never ever "I don't know"

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I read this more than ten years ago in the Scottish's Daily Mail zodiac column. But the words stick in my mind even until now. It went something like this:

"For you the hardest word to say is not "sorry". It is "I don't know".

Not sure whether to laugh or to be offended by it. Hits right between the eyes. The oh-so-familiar statements of "Sure, I know", "Oh I know somebody who knows", or "I am not sure, but let me find out".

Things I do to make my life more complicated.

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APRIL BABY

Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and travelling. Systematic. hot but has brains.

-from a chain email titled What baby are you?-


Hot but has brains. I like that ;)

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Note: Mi'raj— 2nd and 3rd stage (By A. Chodjim)

[Bahasa Indonesia]

After discussing the Adam stage, which reflects our effort to dettach ourselves from the world, we are on the second stage.

During the mi’raj, on the second sky, Muhammad met Isa and Yahya. Yahya means life, while Isa is able to bring the dead back to life.

On the second stage, we learn how to—try to—put meaning to our life, and even give life to other people.

Several things that we can learn at this stage:
* Complete surrender to God.
* Not taking side, except to the Truth.
* Ability to face challenges.
* All are His.
* Free from material attachment.

Only by doing this we can start giving life to others. And only by going through this, we can enter the third stage: Yusuf; where we can see the beauty beyond the beauty.

There are seven things which reflect Yusuf (or Joseph)’s wisdom:
* See beauty beyond the beauty.
* Better to be in jail than to humiliate others.
* Choose to save a lot of people than just himself.
* Forgive and not hold grudges.
* Accept only tasks in which he is really capable of.
* Always talk kindly.
* Conduct religion in its purest way.

All these are processes. But we need to start. From ourselves. If not us, then who?

Only people who understand the meaning of life and give life to others (pass the Yahya and Isa stage) can see the beauty beyond the beauty (Yusuf stage); and only people who have passed the material life (Adam stage) that can give life to others.

Complete note of this discussion (In Indonesian) can be downloaded from here.

Accept what can be accepted. Appreciate the difference among us. Each with her/his own’s needs and stage of growth.

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27 years of managing school for needy children

[Bahasa Indonesia]

These kind of people--people who actually dedicate their time, their life, for other people in need--have often put me to shame. And put my life back to perspective.

I have just visited a school managed by my mom’s friend, Ibu Su’dan. She and her late husband established the school in 1980 under the name Ittiqon Foundation for needy children in North Jakarta.

They started with less than 10 students in old wooden house. They literally had to visit the houses in surrounding area and asked parents to let their children go to school. “What’s the use, they will end up being a garbage collector, like me,” they said.

Twenty seven years have passed (My God, twenty seven years!). Now 800 elementary and junior high school students go to that school. For free. Some students who want to pay are a allowed to pay at will. Some students actually save their money to pay for the school as best as they can.

Forty-two amazing noble people teach in the school, with ‘salary’ way below the minimum regional wage. They even cook for the students, if need be. The head of the school once stated that they were free to leave if they wanted to look for better job, but they said they liked it there.

On rare occasions, the students receive milk, rice or even cheese bread. Ibu Sudan said that some never had tasted cheese before and they threw it away because they said it was salty. The milk gave them indigestion at first because they were not used to it.

I was so proud to hear that a student from the school was in the top five best score for final exam among all students in North Jakarta.

Some graduates from the school receive diploma scholarship from UIN Syarif Hidayatullah. Upon receiving the diploma, they return to the school and teach. A full beautiful cycle has been accomplished.

Now the school has just finished building two more classes. They are about to receive support from an organization to build 15 more classes with . Yet there are a lot to be done.

Here’s my wish list:

  • Weekly milk or some sort of nourishment.
  • Regular health check up.
  • Book or educational tool supplies.
  • Better wage for the teachers.
  • Occasional bonuses for the teachers.
  • Better school building.
  • And that these children will grow to be greater people, more than you or me.
Any one?


start doing something. anything.

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Note: Mi'raj--the first stage (A. Chodjim)

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Mi’raj has often been discussed as a journey that Muhammad has taken from Jerusalem to the seven layers of sky. In each layer of sky (do we call it heaven?), Muhammad met different prophet.

Rarely the mi’raj has been discussed in its more esoteric meaning, as implementation in human life, despite the fact that it is actually a journey to God. The seven heavens are the stages that we need to go through.

In the first heaven, there was Adam. In Arabic, Adam means soil, or earth. It represents the attachment we have with this physical world.

To pass this stage, we need to realize how this attachment has hampered our journey as human. This would is just a facility for us to grow. Happiness does not come from outside; it grows from within.

Hopefully we realize this without we come face to face with death. And we hope we can continue our journey to the next stage.

Complete note of this discussion (in Indonesian) can be downloaded from here.

Accept what can be accepted. Appreciate the difference among us. Each with her/his own’s needs and stage of growth.

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Signs

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Do you believe in subtle signs we receive from nature? I do.

When I went home last night, I was listening to a radio talkshow. The topic was "Time to quit your job." Nice topic for the state that I was in. So I thought, hm.

I kept listening to the show. At the very end, at the closing of the talkshow, the announcer said "but if you hold on and stay throughout the thicks and thins of your company, then it would be good for you(r portfolio)."

Hm. Things you learn when you stay (tune) until the end.

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Thanks. Friends.

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Yesterday a friend (and a mentor) emailed me to respond to my previous thread. She said, "Have a nice cup of coffee, put on your ipod while watching people passing you by. Life is beautiful." Thank you.

Another friend whom I often confide to asked, "When was the last time you sat down with a friend and poured your heart out?". Good question. I cannot remember. That is just not how things work for me now.

She suggested, "Why don't you have a cup of coffee with your close friend(s) and do that?" She did not realize, in my mind, that was what I was doing with her.

That evening I decided to do what I had not done for a long time. My 11pm nightly appointment with You. I prayed. I confided. For a short while. As I walked out of the room, my cat rushed in and laid down on my prayer mat. So I sat down again. And I meditated. This time for a longer while.

Today is weekend. I am off to yet another forgotten ritual of mine. Saturday's breakfast at a nearby coffeeshop, with only myself, my books and some passer-bys (how do you spell this word btw) as companies.

Thank you. All of you.

And to You: I did not realize how much I have missed my conversation with You. I should have come to You sooner. A lot sooner. Every second of my life. I am so sorry. But I am here now. And I hope You let me, You help me, be here all the time from now on.

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Tired

I wish I have something wise to say. I wish I have more contemplative words to convey. I wish I have something positive to tell. But I don't. Not now. I am just simply plainly tired.

There are times when you start wondering what is around the corner. There are times when you start looking for that silver lining in every cloud, any cloud. There are times when you ask yourself which way to go. Or start questioning why, how. My time is now.

I know I am blessed. I know I am so so so lucky. I know things are just the way it should be, the way it needs to be. Life is one great big plan to improve oneself. But what I know and what I feel can be two different things.

And I feel this to my bones. I am just simply plainly tired. Help.

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Happy Kartini Day

[Bahasa Indonesia]

The 21st of April is celebrated as Kartini Day in Indonesia. You cannot miss it if you are in Indonesia. You switch on the TV, read a newspapers or a mag, pass by a billboard, go to a shopping center, and you bound to hear “to commemorate Kartini’s legacy..”. To those who observe the day, happy Kartini day to you.

But with all due respect to you and to Ibu Kartini herself, I always wonder about two things (1) how many of us really know the history behind this Kartini Day, and (2) what makes Kartini so special. Why is there Kartini Day but not, for instance, Tjut Nyak Dien Day?

I suppose I should not be so hung up on this. What is more important is the spirit to empower women and to support gender mainstreaming (Speak the lingo, guys). And this is my impression of the day.

I went to a Femina’s seminar on franchising for women today. I was so amazed by the number of people (or rather, women) turned up at the event. So many. And they looked determined as well.

In the morning session, there were two speakers (all male btw). Amir Karamoy and Rhenald Khasali. Pak Amir, to me, spoke more straight to the point. He sticked to the theme of the day: franchising, while Pak Rhenald, absorbing as he was as a public speaker, was talking about more general things (and more relevant to his new book).

It was refreshing to me to learn that during the Q&A session, much more questions were directed to Pak Amir. Participants wanted to know about franchising. It showed determination. It showed single mindedness. I was so proud, somehow.

On another but related topic, this morning's Kompas also featured a female becak driver Ibu Aminah. She has been doing this for five years to support her family of 10 children. Ten children. That’s another subject. But Ibu Aminah is a real hero to me.

All in all, the very fact that we are still celebrating Kartini Day, however, implies that there is something to fight for still. As with the very fact there is a minimum quota for women in the Indonesian parliament. Or a state minister for women empowerment. Or poligamy. Or domestic violence. Or husbands that do not want to have anything to do with domestic chores. Or people saying “must be the mother” when a child goes astray. etc. Long way to go.

Happy Kartini day to all. And happy Kartika to you, han & your fam ;)

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Anand Krishna

I met Anand Krishna last night.

Have you ever shaked hands with a person and felt that you want to cry? I have. At least, now I have.

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A Year with Rumi, on the 15th of April

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I was curious about what he had written for today. Page 127.


Bewilderment

There are many guises for intelligence.
One part of you is gliding in a high windstream,
while your more ordinary notions
take little steps and peck at the ground.

Conventional knowledge is death to our souls,
and it is not really ours. It is laid on.
Yet we keep saying we find "rest" in these "beliefs".

We must become ignorant of what we have been taught
and be instead bewildered.

Run from what is profitable and comfortable.
Distrust anyone who praises you.
Give your investment money, and the interest
on the capital, to those who are actually destitute.

Forget safety. Live where you fear to live.
Destroy your reputation. Be notorious.
I have tried prudent planning long enough.
From now on. I'll be mad.

Hmm. Wow. Happy birthday.

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Mama Loren said..

"In 2012, Indonesia will get better, people are starting to repent and do good."

...

"But the population in Indonesia would be halved. About 40%. The other 60% would be gone."

.he he.

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Struggling

[Bahasa Indonesia]

"Hm, something is wrong here. I cannot pull my claws out of this sofa. Ok, breath, relax, I shall be fine"


"Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, umph, umph, rrrrrrrrrr"


"Arrrrghghghghtthhgghg, miauw, miauw. **&*^%^(!!"


"Hmph. Tired. Oh well. Perhaps I should just stay here. Hey, where's that fish? Hungry."



[Model: Miauw, The cat]

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Book: Syech Siti Jenar - By Achmad Chodjim

Note: the book is in Indonesian language. Klik ini untuk Bahasa Indonesia.

I finally have finished reading Syech Siti Jenar by Achmad Chodjim. Thanks to the easter long weekend holiday. This posting is mostly taken from the last chapter of the book.

Syech Siti Jenar's view is a blend of middle eastern sufi and Javanese mystics. The emphasis is not physical, rather it is based on Love, in the form of manunggaling kawula kawan Gusti, tauhid al wujud, the oneness of the Creator and the creation.

He argued that religion will be beautiful if it is in line with God's law of nature, which is the existence of various forms and beings, as opposed to uniform existence.

Let religion grows in harmony with wherever it grows, in harmony with the local ecosystem. In his case, it was the land of Java. His teaching is an assimilation of the Arab-based Islam and the Javanese culture.

Alquran, he said, should be understood by its substance. Not an easy thing. Thus, the choice of teacher (guru) is crucial. The teacher should be a concrete manifestation of Alquran, able to provide guidance. Someone who understands the law, smart and with quality ibadah (not sure how to translate this).

Understanding the law means understanding the social rules of life in that particular environment or state. Understanding the life ethics. And the local social values.

Quality ibadah does not mean somebody who do all the rituals. Rather, it means his unconditional dedication to life without wanting anything in return. His sincerity in life which is reflected in his everyday life.

The teacher should be somebody who are able to hold himself together against all the temptations in life. Someone who has smart analitical thought and is proven to be able to face the challenges in life.

Siti Jenar also emphasized on the revival of self. A life with true rights, independence and destiny. An existence that does not dominate nor dominated by other being.

I myself think I need more time to contemplate upon the book, much more to implement it in my life. But I hope this is useful, for you and for me.

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April for me

[Bahasa Indonesia]

April always reminds me of Spain. It is the best time to visit Seville, where one of the most majestic and traditional easter celebrations is being held (or staged!).

April is the time for Feria de Abril, a fun fun fun people’s traditional week-long party when practically nobody sleeps in Seville. (And it is not even holidays. They just party the whole night and work by day for a week.)

April was also the time when I moved to Barcelona, for another episode of my life, where I was blessed with the opportunity to stay with the family of such a passionate lady painter.

I would like to thank Spain for the one of fondest life memories I have ever had. It was certainly one of the best birthday presents God has ever given me. You would not know just how much it has helped me grow into what I am today.

Let me link this to my previous post in English. And in Spanish.

Os quiero, y recuerdo. Siempre.

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Who are our idols?

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I was listening to Trijaya Radio, Thursday afternoon. The talkshow with Arfan whoever (forgot the last name, could not find his name either in Trijaya website). He was talking about being oneself.

One interesting question from him was: who are your idols? Name three people that you look up to. And Why. Answer to those questions reveal our own important values. Interesting.

So I start to do that exercise for myself. Three people. I can only think of the people who are close to me.

My late father Long term vision. Humble. SImple. Straight to the point. No bull sh*t. Freedom that he gives to his children to grow.

My mom. (terribly) humble. Unlimited patience. Surrender to God. Willingness to be in the shadow of her husband and children (while giving tremendous continuous support).

My aunt. Cheerful and positive in all conditions. Great story teller, full of enthusiasm and expressiveness.

One extra? My sis. Strong as a rock. And the way she rear her children. Simply amazing.

I also respect several public figures. Bill Clinton for his charisma and communication techniques. Mother Theresa for her unconditional sacrifice. Johny Depp for his courage and success in choosing his films and his decision to life away from the glamourous Hollywood (and he's just simply drop dead gorgeous).

My brain kept on rolling. Gus Dur for his brilliance and dark humor. Arwin Rasyid for his strong and humble leadership. Janet Jackson for her six pack (hm, is this respect or envy?). The list obviously is getting too long.

Now, what does being oneself mean? Who is the real me? How do I know? Who am I now? Is what I am now the real me? What's the benefits of being myself? What's the down side? How do I do that?

Ah, so many questions going on in my head. As always. Me being me.

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Discussion: Muhammad as a role model

[Bahasa Indonesia]

I (finally) have decided to share the notes I make during my religious study sessions in the blog. I made this particular one last week on making Muhammad as a role model, in conjuction with the celebration of the birth of Muhammad. The session was led by Achmad Chodjim.

Anyone who longs for a meeting with God until the end of time, who always remember God, can make Muhammad as his/her role model. (QS 33:21).

QS 7:157 stated that Muhammad is always accompanied by “the light”, or more specifically, the spiritual light. Although he is no longer with us physically, the light still exists. This light is what we should seek.

Muhammad Al Ghazali divides role modeling into three categories. Some mimic Muhammad's physical appearance or literally without understanding the context and history behind it. Some learns from those who have already understood. And some learn through his/her own searching and contemplation.

During the session, Achmad Chodjim focused on the third. We look and learn from Muhammad's efforts in seach for the light. Then things will unfold by itself.

The more we receive the light, the more we will be guided, the more we will be civilised, and the ego will be underplayed. We will no longer depend on what other people are saying. All we need to do is to contemplate.

We will not be easily provoked, and will not use the religion for our own selfish purpose. Much easier said than done, I know.

Complete version (In Indonesian only unfortunately) can be downloaded here.

Please accept what can be accepted and appreciate the differences among us. To each his or her own needs and stage of growth.

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Hee Ah Lee, the four-finger pianist

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Last week Jakarta was honored with the arrival of Hee Ah Lee. She held a sold out solo concert. I will let you decide yourself by watching the video below I have linked from YouTube. Courtesy of Sammania.



The effort, persistence, courage and love that have built this. Amazing.

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Happy easter, everyone

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Love and peace throughout the world. And within.

Here are some pictures from one of the most amazing easter celebrations in the world: Semana Santa in Seville, Spain.





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Patience

[Bahasa Indonesia]

Patience seems to be the lesson of the week (or is it the lesson of a lifetime?) for me.

I have been feeling impatience these last couple of months. I thought it was boredom. But it looks like boredom is just the symptom. Patience (or rather, the lack of it) is the problem.

I realized that when I was complaining about something to a friend. And all she said at the end was: “(Just do it) one by one. You will never know”. I stopped complaining that very minute. I knew she was right. The path has been set. All I have to do is walk it.

‘Coincidently’, I received an sms from another friend yesterday. She told me about a quranic study session which I have not been in for about two years. I attended the session because I happenned to be in the area. Guess what the main topic was: patience. One of the few things we should ask from God, through prayer and by doing good.

They say that God is with those who are patient. So the teacher in the session asked "Does patience has a limit?". He then said yes, when God is no longer with us. So when you lose your patience, you know who you are with, or without.

He also pointed out that patience needs knowledge. Just like when you cook rice, if you know that it will take about 15-20 minutes for the rice to be cooked, then you will be patience during those 15-20 minutes. Interesting points.

There you go. I have been told about what to do and how to do it. Patience definitely is the lesson of the week (or of a lifetime?) for me.

Patience, persistence and stamina. With blessing, protection and guidance from You. The path has been set. All I have to do is walk it.

-I told you I would write about you someday.-

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Judging a book by its cover. Just don't

I had just had my lunch in this small place in the alley near my office earlier today. As I turned the corner near a streethawker selling cigarettes, I saw this middle-age lady talking on her cell phone.

She had caught my eyes even from a distance. In the middle of the day, sun shining literally on top of your head, she wore this comfy no-sleeve cotton night gawn, bright green with flowery red pattern. Her hair a bit curly and untidy. Smoking a cigarette while talking on the phone. Standing by a streethawker, choosing something.

Can you imagine her? Right. Then I passed by her, and I could hear what she was saying. She said to her friend on the phone "Then (s)he wanted to enter the Indonesian market at 1.3%, I tell you, is (s)he out of his/her mind.."

I must say, I was a bit, um, taken by surprise. I spontaneously looked at her with this awe in my face. Luckily she was too busy with her phone conversation.

Lesson of the day. Never judge a book by its cover. Not even when it is bright green with flowery red pattern.

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Revealing: me

I had a short conversation today with a friend. She shared her hesitation to link her personal blog to her office blog. It was too personal, she said.

I saw her blog. I can perfectly understand how personal it is to her. In fact, I can say it is so beautifully personal. From a mother to a child. I can feel the emotion. The abundance of love.

I too hesitated to enter the blogsphere once. I too used the same reason, or in my case, excuse. My feeling was just too personal.

But in my case, there was more to it than just being personal. It was more about my lack of ability to share my feeling, my inner thoughts. It was about my ego, or the illusion of ego which I have crafted for so long to show the tough me.

Writing a blog as personal as mine was like revealing the inner me to the world. This put me in a fragile situation.

Then there was the fact that I might hurt someone. I know myself: I am not the most diplomatic person in the world. And I did not want (more) conflict in my life.

At the end, I decided to go for it. I use the blog to share my thoughts. As a training ground for my writing skills. More importantly, use it as a training ground to speak my mind without hurting somebody, trying to see anything from a different perspective, from a more positive point of view.

Most importantly though, use it as a training ground to reveal myself. Revealing: me.

And I want to say this to that friend of mine who hesitated to share her blog: what you are sharing is beatiful. I rarely read a blog and felt such strong feeling (of love). Please don’t stop. And certainly don’t hesitate.

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"Let it go"

This happened more than 10 years ago.

I was in Mecca with my family. We had just got off from a taxi, when I realized that I had left my jacket in the taxi. I panicked. Then my father held my hand, looked me in the eyes, and said: "Let it go."

I still panicked and tried to get my jacket back. My father held my hand even stronger, looked me in the eyes even deeper, and repeated what he had just said: "Let it go." I finally let go.

Even today, whenever I lose someone or something, or whenever I realize I am holding on to something or someone too tight, I tell myself: "Let it go."

Love you, pop.

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So me

I went home quite late. Would I make it to my yoga class, I thought. D*mned, the traffic was extra bad. Not helping.

I said to myself, "If I can get home by 7.45, I will go to the class."

The clock ticked, and ticked. The car was going somewhere alright, but very slowly. "Right, 7.50 is still ok."

Tick, tick, tick. Oh what the heck, I thought. Whatever the time would be, I would still go to the class.

Yeah yeah, I know. I can here my friend saying, "That is so you."

I got home by 7.55p. Rushed to change my clothes and went straight to the gym. Only to find out that my yoga teacher was not coming. Sigh. What a joke. The whole day has been.

There was a replacement teacher. Suddenly my mood for yoga was gone. "Perhaps I should just do treadmill. Or grab a cup of coffee somewhere. Cup of hot coffee. Yeah, that is what I would do."

Then another yoga teacher passed by and asked, "Why aren't you at the class?". I straightforwardly had another change of mind, change of mood, "Yes, I am about to go".

There you go. Talk about a quick change(s) of heart. Yes, I hear that again, "That is so you."

The yoga class turned out to be longer than usual. We had the nicest relaxation session. A nice way to end a very 'funny' day.

Belated happy April fool's day.

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Pak Mus - 2

One of our favorite 'hang out' places while we were in Aceh. The great and solemn Masjid Raya Banda Aceh.

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Pak Mus

A dear friend has just passed away. Bapak Mustafa Alatas. We worked together for a little over a month in Banda Aceh a couple of years ago. He was also the father of another dear friend.

He was such a kind man. He never raised his voice even in the most stressful situation. He always thought of everybody else in the team. There was not a single arrogant thread in his soul. He was a good teacher.

Several days ago, on one sunny day, Pak Mus went to a friend’s funeral in Bogor. He felt exhausted. He took a rest at a relative’s house in Bogor. There he felt a chest pain, then he passed away.

I went to his house that night. I met his wife. His wife greeted me with a smile. She thanked me for coming and asked me to forgive Pak Mus’s mistakes.

She went on telling some people there what had happened. She was so strong. She accepted and went on living. I seldom have seen people or family this strong. And kind.

I supposed, he is still a good teacher even after he has passed away.

So long, Pak. It was an honor to have you as a friend. I might catch up with you some day.

Pic: Aceh sky.

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